Dwight tries again to interrupt Nellie and Packer's flirting, only to pick up a call from Jim, reporting that he saw a bedbug in his room. Which is sort of true. Dwight rushes off to take care of it, but first he orders Gabe to make sure Nellie doesn't sleep with Packer, demanding, "You really want Packer as your boss?" Even Gabe isn't enough of a weirdo to have that as a goal. On his way up, Dwight says he can't risk bringing any bedbugs back to Schrute Farms. "Our biggest attraction is our 200-year-old mattresses." Upstairs, Jim eagerly admits Dwight, who immediately strips the bed (with Kathy still on it, mind you), makes Jim describe the bug (which Jim does, with relish), and announces that he's going to turn himself into a human bedbug trap. He'll do this by getting heated up, undressed, and all covered up in Jim's blankets. Which he does forthwith. Kathy's so grossed out she goes to take a shower. "All right, catch you later!" Jim chirps. He thinks his problem is solved now that he's gotten rid of Kathy, but now he's got Dwight in his bed instead of Kathy on it. Worse: the shower Kathy is using is Jim's.
Down in the bar, Gabe awkwardly sprays something in Packer's beer while he's not looking. Aerosolized seahorse, probably.
Dwight announces to Jim that there are no bedbugs, as he wasn't bitten even while farting continuously under Jim's blankets. Dwight's off to go back to trying to screw Nellie before Packer does and when Jim asks if that's really how Dwight wants to get the job, Dwight calls him a "chorus girl." As if to underline the point, Kathy comes out of the bathroom with wet hair and Jim's hotel-room bathrobe, asking Jim, "Is crazy gone?" The expression on Jim's face says, "Yes and no."
Dwight returns to the bar to find Packer and Nellie drunkenly lurching around the dance floor, until Packer pukes in Gabe's lap. "They don't make these cords in boot-cut any more!" Gabe bitches as he storms off. Dwight makes his move, telling Nellie, "A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present." Then he sits down and is all, "Hey." Because that would totally work.
Kathy's on Jim's room phone ordering dessert, then she clambers over the bed and sticks her bare legs in his face. I know this wouldn't happen anyway, but hello, there are at least two cameras in the room filming all this. You'd think Kathy would be more discreet, but I guess anyone who'd be willing to lounge on a bed full of Dwight-farts must be pretty fucking determined. Jim scrambles to his feet and reminds her that he's happily married. Kathy acts all offended at the suggestion that this is anything but the two of them hanging out, and Jim not only buys it, but apologizes. It's like that bit in The Graduate where Dustin Hoffman is so embarrassed after accusing Anne Bancroft of trying to seduce him. Of course, we know how that turned out. And if Kathy were really offended, would she still be here? Sure enough, as soon as Jim decides it's safe to sit on the bed after all, she snuggles right up next to him.