The Office

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Baby Undaddy

He then THs about how he's like the dog who nurses the tiger cub in some video. "It's bizarre, but it happens." I think we have a tagline for the Season Five DVDs.

Phyllis shakes down the reluctant accountants for contributions, then does a brief TH about how much she enjoys her new position as head of the Party Planning Committee, primarily because of the new dynamic it creates between herself and Angela. But before she can elaborate on the joy of having her foot on Angela's "grape-like head," Michael interrupts her through the window behind her: "Don't talk to them! Make the party!" Phyllis gets back to work with her balloon and hand pump.

Jim's on the phone with Pam, who's trying to quickly tell him some kind of art class story. He's having trouble following it, what with distractions like Dwight listening intently in front of him and Creed wrapping his feet behind him. Plus the story itself is a bit confusing, full of people Jim doesn't know and phrases like "Stacey Koua comes in." after Jim completely misses the point, Pam's out of time and has to ring off. "Who's Stacey Kouakomzen?" Dwight asks Jim curiously.

So that's Jim and Pam's version of not connecting. Here's Andy and Angela's: he brings in a baby photo of himself, for her to tape up onto an easel along with baby pictures of the rest of the staff so people can guess who was whom. Andy blows it big-time, mistaking Phyllis's baby photo for Angela's. I mean, not that a normal person would mind so much, but Angela gets offended and calls him a pervert. I sense another warehouse rendezvous with Dwight in the offing.

Michael comes into the annex to warn Holly that since Jan will no doubt be in an insecure mood about her big, pregnant self and because Holly is "one of the more attractive people in the office," he's going to be acting a little "cold" to Holly out of respect for Jan's feelings. And Ryan as well, in fact to the point where Ryan doesn't even get to be in this episode.

Stanley bitches about having pregnant women in his workspace, and runs down the litany of ways in which they're not any more special than he is. After all, he's got the swollen ankles, sore nipples, etc. "You think I don't need to know the fastest way to the hospital?"

Fortunately, he's not about to have to deal with one, because when Jan arrives, she really doesn't look all that pregnant any more. And she's wheeling a stroller. AND there's a baby in it. "Who do we have here?" Jim asks her, as neutrally as he can manage. Jan breezily answers, "My baby." And now is the moment where Dwight and Michael walk into the bullpen, take in the scene, and look completely gobsmacked, although for different reasons. Michael's reasons are self-explanatory, so we can just skip to Dwight as he THs, "Jan already had the baby, and Michael wasn't there to mark it. So the baby could be anyone's! Except Michael's."

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The Office

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