Erin has joined Michael not only in his office but also in his newfound Sinophobia. She's just learned from Wikipedia (while the rest of us learned from The Amazing Race) that the tallest man in the world is Chinese. "So much for keeping our secrets up high," Michael frets, and charges out into the bullpen to whip up some paranoia about a world where forks are irrelevant and everyone has to play the cello. To stop it, he wants someone to come up with a big idea, right here, right now. Kevin suggests an antacid you only have to take once a week. After pursuing that for a bit, Erin cheerfully floats the idea of hiring a new guy and killing him for a $100,000 life insurance policy. She thinks everyone will like that idea. "I think that's what they're doing to me," Erin whispering-heads. "I can't prove it, but I wanted to see their faces when I said it. I learned nothing." Yes, I've noticed that about her. Back in the bullpen, Michael announces, "I don't know what the fuck that was." Dwight suggests bombing them (and Phyllis agrees), and Michael drops some scary statistic about how many cities China has with more than a million people (56, to the U.S.'s nine). Oscar tries to call him out, and Michael stands his ground (while Andy texts Darryl, "RU watching this?") Ryan jumps online and confirms Michael's stats, humiliating Oscar. "So I happen to know more than the smartest guy in the office, so what, I don't care." Michael gleefully laughing-heads. Michael's ready to move on after besting Oscar, but suddenly the daylight light from the windows is blotted out. DAMN YOU, CHINAAAA!!!