The Office

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: C | 1429 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Chinatown

Dwight breezes through the kitchen inviting Pam to parley. Creed translates that Dwight wants to talk. Pam wonders if everyone in the office speaks pirate code. "I understand it, I can't speak it," Creed admits. Even the Creed jokes are weak, and there's no excuse for that even when you don't also add in the low-hanging fruit of pirate vernacularrrrrrr.

In Dwight's building owner office (which apparently also doubles as the room where his assistant Nate uses some kind of spinning machine to de-ply the toilet paper), he offers to stop watering down the soap. As for her threat to leave the building, Dwight warns her of the stress of moving, and the toll it'll take on her family. "And twenty-five years from now, Cece will become world-famous. For stripping." Pam will se that and raise it: "We move. The other tenants follow. The bank takes the building, takes your farm, takes your car, and beats the crap out of you. Penniless, you die. And my daughter Cece dances on your grave. Fully clothed." The lights go off in the tense silence that ensues, and after they wave them back on, Pam waits with a smug, expectant look on her face.

Ryan has joined the drill team quizzing Michael in his office, and Michael's whiffing on questions like "Where is Tibet?," "When was China founded?" and "Who is Mao?" Andy advises him to steer the conversation to something he knows about. Michael suggests boobs, then realizes he doesn't know much more about them than Oscar does. Andy starts a bit from Rocky II, then backs off, and Ryan offers him a cheat sheet. Michael doesn't want to cheat. "Show him how to use it," Jim suggests.

The Office

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