The Office
The Office

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A | 1019 USERS: C+
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Business School

Karen delivers a bottle of aspirin to Jim, who loudly says he needs it for the headache he's getting as a result of the glare off Angela's crucifix. Dwight THs that he's not entirely up to speed with vampires, although he once shot a werewolf. "But by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor's dog."

Dwight parks himself on the edge of Creed's desk and whispers, "Extraordinary events call for extraordinary actions. Will you form an allegiance--" Creed: "Sure." "Dwight: "To use sudden violence--" Creed: "Okay." Dwight asks if Creed can turn a wooden mop handle into a stake. Creed opens a drawer. We can't see into it because Creed's body is blocking our view, but he asks Dwight, "What size?" Dwight sure went to the right guy.

A student asks how Michael responds to people who leave them for big chains. Michael says, "'You will miss our service, and I guarantee you'll come back.'" When asked if anyone has ever come back, he sheepishly mutters, "We don't want them back. They're stupid." Things get worse, until the guy who asked the first question says, "By your own employee's calculation, you'll be obsolete in the next five to ten years." Ryan: busted.

Creed and Dwight get ready to make their move on the bat. Kelly is yelling at Creed not to hurt it, but as soon as Dwight kicks the conference room door in and the bat is buzzing Kelly's bob, she's screaming, "Kill it! Kill it!" The bat peels off into the kitchen, and Kevin shuts the door behind it without thinking, trapping it again. "I...am a hero!" Kevin realizes. Yes, between this and his blow-out earlier, he's practically Bruce Willis in Unbreakable.

Michael's pissed, spouting angrily at the class about their ivory tower. "And your ebony tower," he adds, gesturing to Ryan's African-American professor. He's not interested in the class's pessimistic views of Dunder Mifflin's future. "Ryan has never made a sale," he adds. "And he started a fire, trying to make a cheesy pita. And everybody thinks he's a tease. Well, you know what? He doesn't know anything, and neither do you. So suck on that!" he bellows, storming out. Should be an awkward drive back to the office.

The Office

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