The Office

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now!
Holly Jolly Christmas

Angela escorts her new boyfriend, "Senator Robert Lipton" (still Jack Coleman, as the guy she met at Dwight's "Hay Place" a few weeks ago) into the office. Oscar introduces himself as "Angela's friend Oscar." They shake hands, and Robert's clearly heard of Oscar before. I bet he has. Oscar THs, "Robert seems great! He's very handsome, a firm handshake, he's gay, good sense of humor..." Wait, what?

Guess who walks in but A.J. He quietly introduces himself to Erin and Kevin at reception, who say, respectively, "I think you should go" and "I bet you didn't even bring us anything, did you?" He's still dealing with that awkwardness when Holly comes out and greets him. Michael (back in his regular suit) comes out and says hi as well, managing to act normal for a full fifteen seconds. How can he manage this? "I am dead inside," he THs. Well, that explains it.

Darryl brings his daughter into the break room, and soon realizes he's hit on the perfect thing: a whole room of vending machines. They come out of the bullpen loaded down with snacks for her to pass out to everyone. The music gets cheerier, indicating either a change in mood or that the bassist has been joined by an invisible piano player. Employees start opening each other's gifts. Kevin got Oscar a pair of tan suede boots. "For your feet!" Kevin explains. Phyllis knitted Ryan an iPad cozy with his name and sign on it (Pisces). Angela got Creed a big Costco multipack of deodorant, so now he'll be able to smell like a man and not death. Erin got Andy an allegedly funny card. Michael's busy in the bathroom cleaning Holly's Woody with a toothbrush, complete with his tiny clothes on a makeshift clothesline overhead.

Angela boasts about her boyfriend while Oscar grins at him and Ryan comes in looking for someone to make him a fancy drink. Oscar sees Robert checking out Ryan's ass. I think Oscar's having a better time than anyone.

Pam and Jim settle down in the break room to exchange gifts, like they can't do this at home. Pam opens hers first -- a diamond bracelet she loves. Jim smugs in a TH, "Yep, I do make great Christmas gifts. But I couldn't make that." He opens the comic book she drew him and gushes, "This is...awesome.. That's my bike!" Is he faking? Well, he does a rare non-talking talking head. And that's really the best Pam could hope for.

As the party continues, A.J. and Holly are holding hands. Michael leaves without a word to anyone, but Pam follows him out. He warns her about slipping, and tells a story about a woman who slipped on some black ice, went into a permanent coma, and was visited by her husband every day until she died. When Pam remarks how sad that is, Michael sobs, "Well, at least he was married." Pam tries to cheer him up, and when that doesn't work, she says, "I shouldn't tell you this, but A.J. won't commit to Holly," and tells him about Holly's planned ultimatum. No, she shouldn't have told him that, especially since driving down here seems like the kind of thing A.J. might have done to propose. Still, Michael's certainly not crying any more, and Pam tells him to be patient. He offers to walk her back into the office, so she doesn't fall. Sure, that's why.

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