At the company picnic, Michael's got an agenda to try to win Holly back from her boyfriend, which he plans to accomplish by putting on a comedy routine with her. It goes from long and unfunny to upsetting and unfunny when they basically announce the imminent closing of the Buffalo branch. Oops. That kind of puts a pall on the picnic, and Michael decides to hold off on telling Holly how he feels for now. "I'm in no rush," he tells us. Hey, dude, this isn't just about you.
Meanwhile, Scranton vows to avenge Buffalo on Corporate in the final game of the volleyball tournament. Unfortunately, ringer Pam hurts her leg, and Wallace and Charles insist Jim take her to the hospital, ostensibly to protect the company but really to get her off the court. Which Jim does, while Dwight stalls for time before calling in a sub. At the hospital, though, getting Pam back to the game becomes moot when she and Jim get some news. Some big, big, big news. How big? Big. I don't want to spoil it now, but we'll learn more when the new season starts in nine months. Oops, I mean three months! Three. Not nine months.
(…gosh, nine months? What was I thinking?...)
Look back at Michael's career highlights.
Let's just forget that last week ever happened, shall we?
New Kelly has already learned the fine art of covering for Michael, in this case because he's dead-asleep with his head on his desk. As Jim explains in a TH, Michael ate a whole 9-inch chicken pot pie for lunch and crashed out. "So we're all trying to be very quiet so as to not wake him up before five PM, which..." Jim holds up the wall clock and spins the hands from 12:50 to 4:50. "...actually should be in about ten minutes."
Outside Michael's closed office door, Jim and Pam stand in their stocking feet, conspiring in a whisper to change Michael's computer clock and watch. "What do you need from me?" Dwight whispers. He THs that he normally wouldn't condone this, but he has an appointment with the horse doctor. "How that horse became a doctor, I don't know," he borscht-belts, cracking himself up before saying he's kidding. "He's just a regular doctor who shoots your horse in the head when its leg is broken." Dwight goes down and changes the dashboard clock on Michael's car while PB&J are busy in his office. "Like clockwork," Dwight smirks.
With everything in place, including the office lights off, Jim gives a silent countdown. On zero, New Kelly flips the lights on and everyone starts laughing at once. Michael wakes up, laughing harder and longer than anyone else, and notices the clock at 5:01. "See you all tamale," he says. Everyone assembles in the parking lot to watch him drive out, and they give themselves a big hand.
"Welcome Family & Friends to the Annual DUNDER MIFFLIN INC COMPANY PICNIC," reads the big sign after some severely truncated credits. Jim and Pam, wearing red baseball shirts with "Scranton" across the chest in script, enter the busy event, clearly not looking forward to a lengthy stay. "Should I have left the car running?" he jokes before they notice the camera. In a TH, they explain what happened last year. Apparently some drunk guy hit on Pam. "Yeah, you don't grab these for balance," Pam points out. Jim doesn't seem to think it's such a bad idea. In fact, he's suddenly looking a little tipsy right now.
Dwight has brought a friend, and it's obvious they're made for each other. They're using light meters to calculate the ideal SPF for the day, and Dwight busts out a homemade jar of sunscreen/repellent. "You think the EPA would ever allow that much DEET?" he asks, and they cackle. Dwight THs how he and Rolf met, in a shoe store: "I heard him asking for a shoe that could increase his speed and not leave any tracks."