The Office

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Dressed to Kill (but Enough about Dwight)

Michael returns to Darryl's office to give him what-for about the breakdown in the chain of command and of society in general, as shown by Gabe being dressed as Lady Gaga. Darryl correctly deploys the usually-infuriating non-apology apology, "I'm sorry if it seems that way to you," which is still more than Michael deserves, but Michael wants Darryl to say it in front of everyone. Darryl declines: "You made a bad call and I fixed it." Michael stomps out, but I'm thinking that's not the end of it.

Andy's trying to explain his costume to Stanley, who awesomely says, "How many freaking vampires am I supposed to care about these days?" No shit, dude. Oscar has changed out of his costume, pompously claiming that he's now a "rational consumer." Phyllis in her judge's robe pretends to get it and wanders off. Pam starts handing out the ballots, and out comes Michael, wearing Oscar's discarded afro wig and Darryl's old warehouse shirt, yelling like his idea of an obnoxious black man. "Happy Halloween, jerk!" he spits at Darryl as a climax.

Into an awkward silence that has lasted the entire commercial break, Michael adds that in case anybody still doesn't get his costume (which, come on, even Kevin and Creed do), he goes over people's heads. Pam quietly tells Michael that this is a bad idea. "When has that ever worked for you?" "NEVER!" Michael yells, and angrily doffs the wig. Kelly demands of Michael, "Could you for once just let us enjoy a party instead of making it about all your issues?" Wow, did you see that fourth wall shake?

Everyone walks the "runway" (actually the space between the desks and the conference room wall) in character. Creed shambles along as a mummy, then Stanley swings his samurai sword, then Kelly, then Oscar, who is still doing his "rational consumer." I still don't get who Ryan's supposed to be, but then that's been the case for years. Gabe does some Lady Gaga moves even more awkwardly than Lady Gaga does. Whoa -- Angela's changed into a naughty nurse costume, complete with white thigh-highs and an indignant response to the interviewer. "They were sold out of all the other costumes. Okay? I think we all live in the real world here. Let's not pretend to be unaware of what sells in this office." And apparently Angela's willing to sell it for $15,000 worth of money-saving coupons.

Michael wants to join in on a Ouija board session by suggesting they ask it "if Darryl is a bad friend who stabs people in the back?" Jim: "We have one question to ask the spirit world and you want us to ask that?" Of course the planchette points to no, which Michael thinks is because Darryl moved it, so Michael asks Dwight to back him up. "I saw exactly what the two of you wanted me to see," Dwight says, and then THs, "I know how to sit on a fence." Dwight claims he can even sleep on a fence: "The trick is to do it facedown with the post in your mouth." Michael, now with his own hands on the pointer, asks the spirits for one word to describe Darryl, and the two of them fight over the planchette as it spells out "A-S-S...E-T." Clearly the spirits aren't so into fence-sitting.

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The Office

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