The Office

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Pretty Dwight

It develops that Dwight has cancelled all of Andy's clients at the mall, "while using the F-word," and he plans to do the same with everyone's clients. Everyone asks again what happened, and Dwight sadly tells a story about wanting something fancy, but when the salespeople first ignored him and then started snapping him with their cameraphones. Kelly suggests Dwight go back and "Pretty Woman" their asses, and even though she tuned herself out, Jim suggests taking Dwight back there to teach them a lesson. Andy wants in, too. "Did you automatically assume I'd side with the rich, snobby shop owner?" Andy asks us, tossing aside his cufflinks and tie clip. "How about now?"

Toby is still trying to get something from Michael, who says they've done one hour and he wants to get the rest done. Toby says they don't count if he doesn't talk, and Michael's anger over that is the closest to progress he's gotten. But Michael THs, "Be careful what you wish for, Toby."

Dwight tries to explain the plot of Pretty Woman per his incomplete understanding, while Jim watches Andy do his hair. Andy takes the story over, until Kelly comes in and bogarts the punch line, the part where Julia Roberts says, "Big mistake." Much like this storyline.

A salesman comes into the office wanting to talk to the office administrator about window treatments, but who's the office administrator? "I am," says Pam, jumping up from her desk. And then she handles it by telling the salesman they're not interested. Pam explains to us about the two ways to get a promotion: "One is to wait for an opening and apply for it. That's the main way. But this could work." That's supposed to be a joke, but I once had a boss who advised me that if I wanted a promotion I should act like I already had it. I don't work for her any more, but still.

Michael has decided to "open up" to Toby by talking about being probed by ALF. "You might think he's a puppet. Never see the lower half, but there's a lower half." Somehow he makes it sound haunting.

In the kitchen, Oscar asks Pam when she became the office administrator. Pam makes up a story about how it happened a few months ago, and bounces various salaries off Oscar until she lands on one he seems to buy, even though he's just playing along. He knows, but she doesn't know he knows.

Jim and Andy present mid-makeover Dwight to the bullpen for their input. Kelly advises Dwight that his shirt and tie are "disgusto-barfo." What else is new? Ryan suggests Dwight lose his glasses, and Dwight stomps on them. Whereupon Pam and Kelly say they liked them. So does Ryan, of course. "I can't see," Dwight observes. There are also some lessons in manners, and he and Angela practice saying "thank you" to each other a few times. I'd tell them to get a room, but that won't actually be necessary.

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The Office

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