The Office
Diwali

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Diwali

Inside, Ryan is telling Kelly's parents about himself. Which is really two conversations at once, because they're trying to treat him like he's a serious suitor, and he's just looking forward to buying an Xbox. They pointedly ask if there's anything Ryan wanted to ask them tonight. And there's Ryan's "trapped by Kelly" expression again, which is impressive on her part given the fact that she's not even at the table.

Pam is telling the whole doctor what a typical Michael move they just witnessed. But the whole doctor is kind of impressed with the size of Michael's samosas. "He's really outgoing, huh?" he asks Pam in admiration. Pam's like, that's one word for it, and just like that, the whole doctor is done. There's only one person Pam can share this moment with, just as Jim had to call -- well, someone -- when he thought Dwight had a hooker in his hotel room. Pam goes out into the hallway, fiddling with her cell phone, and runs into Angela unhappily munching on her dry naan. Pam invites her in to join the dancing, but Angela has appointed herself shoe guardian, because she's convinced somebody will steal them if she doesn't watch them. Which raises the question: Who would want to wear someone else's shoes home? Angela has a question of her own for Pam: "Who are you texting?"

Although Angela doesn't get an answer, we do. Jim is passed out on his desk, the cell phone next to his head vibrating with Pam's message. It sounds kind of hot when you put it that way. Andy is laid out on the floor, singing "Closer to Fine." "Andy, no a cappella," Karen decrees. Andy falls silent, possibly due to unconsciousness. But after a moment he starts up again, and Jim comes around enough to join in, much to Karen's horror. Bet she's regretting trashing those shots now. "Tuna! Are you kidding me?" Andy crows gleefully, like this means they're going to be doing vocal duets for the rest of their joint career. It's almost as magical as if Jim had gotten Pam's text message.

Pam comes out and finds Michael on the school steps, trying to choke down some more spicy Indian food. Luckily she brought him a cup of water, which she hands over, waiting for a response on her phone that isn't going to come. She sits next to Michael on the steps, and he decides that means it's therapy time. He tries to bond with her over their broken engagements, which doesn't really work as Pam reminds him that he wasn't actually engaged. "I was in the marriage arena, though," Michael says. Pam lets it go, and says she thought something would happen tonight too. Fortunately Michael is too self-absorbed to ask what, which of course is what she was counting on. "We're so alike," Michael says, and then turns his face towards her, closing his eyes and sticking his lips out. It is horrifying. Pam shoots him down, quite straightforwardly for her, and that's Michael rejected by two women in one night. Finally he begs, "Can I have a ride home?" "If you sit in the back," Pam says. She must not have a trunk.

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The Office

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