A very ill-groomed, disreputable-looking character in a dirty coverall shuffles in. On second glance, it turns out to be Andy. This tragic figure, slouches into Nellie's office, literally gets on his knees and begs a horrified Nellie for any job at all, no matter how humiliating. She generously ("generously" = "to get him out of her office") allows him to clean the carpets for today. He bows and scrapes out of there and then waggles his eyebrows at us conspiratorially. Out in the hallway, he tells us, "I have a delicious secret." Yeah, we know. After a quick clip of him cleaning the carpet with a mop and a bucket, his next hallway TH shows him unable to keep it in any longer. As hinted last week, he convinced David Wallace to buy back Dunder Mifflin from Sabre and at three o'clock today, "Wallace is going to walk in here and reinstate me as manager!" This has to be Andy's Michael Scott-est move ever.

Pam schleps the Halfperts in for the family portrait, much to Jim's horror. She admits that like Jim, she's not a hundred percent sure Dwight won't harm a child. "But it's free and we'll keep an eye on them and we will make sure Dwight will not do anything C-R-A-Z-Y!" The head into the break room and arrange themselves in front of the backdrop, with Jim giving paranoid glances all over the room and shielding the kids with his arms. The photo is snapped and Jim seems surprised that that's it. For someone who just cruelly Photoshopped Dwight last week, he should know better.

Or, you know, maybe it's not all about Jim for once. Angela's husband shows up with their baby, since his office got a call about the free portraits. Angela's been flanked, so Erin gives them a map to the break room. Dwight greets them and asks to hold the baby, but Angela's not having that. She THs, "I think that Dwight is doing this whole thing to get a sample of my baby's DNA to prove he's the father. Which is impossible. Because the Senator is the only man I've ever been with." Dwight watches evilly as the Liptons get set up for their picture, in a way that pretty much confirms Angela's theory. After the ads, he produces a comb to fix the baby's hair, but Angela slaps it away.