Jim interviews that he broke up with Karen after his interview in New York. She returned to Scranton (...somehow, Jim having left her there without a ride) and laid into him (which we see), telling him that just because their relationship was over didn't mean she would be leaving the office, and then the next day she was gone -- on to a much crappier show, apparently. Jim tells the camera that he's single now, so if the unseen producer knows anyone, dot dot dot.
Pam interviews that she and Jim went out a few times, she talked him through his breakup with Karen, and now she's happy that they've gone back to being good friends. I mean, I think that's what she said; I can't quite get the entire message clear when her face is partially concealed behind her WEB OF LIES.
And then KEVIN announces that Pam and Jim are full of shit and have been "totally hooking up," but just aren't telling anyone. The shot widens as Kevin turns to Oscar, sitting next to him, for corroboration, but Oscar is more cautious, saying that there "is no evidence of intimacy" (um, ew), and that although Jim and Pam have been in great spirits, it could be due to other causes. Yes, I know I perk up when all my favorite TV shows come back, so that very well could be the reason.
Back at Reception, Pam and Jim lie about their weekend plans while Kevin looks on, shaking his head at the camera in disgust. Pam's not going to the flea market, and Jim's not going mountain-biking, because they're clearly going to be spending the weekend creating "evidence of intimacy." Sorry. But Oscar started it.
Michael enters the office in a zombielike trance and announces that Meredith has been struck by a car in the parking lot. Everyone is shocked and horrified as Michael explains that he took her to the hospital, and makes it sound at first like she's actually died (Stanley: "What is wrong with you?") before downplaying an apparent fractured pelvis. Andy asks whether Michael saw who did it, and Dwight shrugs that they can just check the security tapes. Realizing that he can't avoid it any longer, Michael reveals that he was able to respond so quickly to Meredith's injuries because he was in the car that struck her. Jim, quietly: "Who was driving?" There's a long beat, and then Pam moans, "Oh, Michael." Let a brother answer, woman!
Jim interviews about another time Michael came in complaining about a speed bump on the highway, and wonders whom Michael hit that time. You know, cataloguing past mistakes is the business of another show, dude.