Dwight's walking across the warehouse floor with a giant telescope marked $150.00. Jim compliments him on it, but when Dwight sees the "miracle legumes" back on Jim's table, he says he'll take them. "They're probably worthless," Jim says, handing them over. Dwight agrees, and as he walks away, Jim says, "Leave the telescope." In a TH, Dwight talks about his day's journey with its humble beginnings and how it led him to discover what's really of value. "And I can just go buy another telescope."
Michael comes down to the warehouse to find Holly counting the thirteen bucks they've raised today. He's even happier to see that they still have most of their stuff. Holly says she's sorry for putting him on the spot and she's not going to Colorado. Michael invites her to go for a walk. "I want to show you some stuff," she says. Holly smiles like she knows what's coming. She really doesn't.
First is the lobby that's now Hank's, one of Michael's favorite places in the world because it's where Toby announced that he was going to Costa Rica. After groping Pam. Not that Michael was there when that happened. "Happiest day of my life, until the day you came to replace him." Which isn't entirely true, because the day Michael met Holly was also the day he found out Jan was pregnant. Next is the stairwell, where they first kissed, and the landing where they first made love. "Remember what I tried there?" he reminds her a few steps up, making her blush. Outside his office, he shows her how he first saw her though those blinds, with all her boxes, "And I thought you were the prettiest mover I'd ever seen." Actually he hated her until she talked to him, but that could ruin the moment. As for his desk, that's where he was sitting at that desk when he called to tell her he had herpes and was still in love with her, "And you said that it was over and you didn't love me, and thank goodness none of that was true." Including the part about Michael still being in love with her? "Including the herpes. Ingrown hair."
Then the conference room, where they co-ran their first meeting on obesity awareness, and she first met Michael Klump. "That's where you realized that Meredith was prostituting herself for Outback Steak." He says it was cute how wrong she thought that was. Then to the water cooler, where he used to stand so he could stare at her through the window. Although now the blinds are closed, so nobody's staring at anything. "Let's go in here," he says, opening the door. And there's everyone else -- everyone -- lining the hallway to the annex, each holding a candle. And not half-used ones, either. Michael says this is where their love faces its toughest test. "After this it's all smooth sailing for the rest of our lives." Or at least the rest of the Michael episodes. Jim says, "Holly, will you marry me?" Holly says no. I have to assume Pam agreed to this. Stanley asks, and Holly says no to him, too. "That guy's got more than he can handle as it is," Michael remarks. Oscar also proposes, and is politely turned down. "That marriage would be a sham," Michael says. Gabe asks, and Holly gives what Michael calls an "easy no." She also declines a proposal from Angela, although Michael admits, "That would be hot, I would pay to see that." She also says no to Ryan. "Only one that I was kinda worried about," Michael says. I bet Kelly was too.
On into the annex, where there are candles covering every possible surface -- not just Holly's desk, but Kelly's and Gabe's too. Not too late to burn the place down after all, I see. Holly walks in and Michael says, "This is where I fell in love with you. And this is where I ask you to marry me." The rest of the gang, still out in the hallway, opens the blinds to watch. Michael gets down on both knees, and so does Holly. Michael begins what's clearly going to be a big speech -- and that's when the overhead sprinklers start going off, soaking everyone. After a moment of shocked laughter and recovery, Michael wisely forgoes the speech, presents the ring, and asks in a bad Yoda voice, "Holly Flax, marrying me will you be?" "You're wife becoming me will I," she says, and they both crack up before he puts the ring on her finger and they kiss. Everyone else cheers and bursts into the room with their congratulations. Shouldn't someone be trying to figure out how to turn the sprinklers off? But first, Michael breaks the news to everyone else that they're moving to Colorado. "All of us?" Kevin asks. "Yup," Michael says. He explains about Holly going back home, and how he's going with her. Just like that. Everyone else suddenly looks a lot less happy. Either they're going to miss Michael and Holly, or they've just realized that everything on their desks is getting ruined.
The tag is just Dwight watering empty planters outside the building. Jim watches surreptitiously from around the corner, and the moment Dwight's gone, he starts wheeling out a cart of fully-grown plants. Oh, Jim, you scamp. I hope the telescope was worth it.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter , or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.