Dwight's still struggling to blow up the turd-colored balloons when his desk phone rings and he dashes out to answer it. Jim asks him how old Kelly is. "Who is this?" Dwight asks. Jim: "It's Mose, who do you think it is?" Dwight: "Mose doesn't know how to use a phone, so joke's on you." Jim's at the store, looking at numbered candles. Dwight confidently answers, "24. 37." Finally he hangs up, pulls Kelly's personnel file, and learns that she spent some time in a "youth center." "Juvie," Dwight translates. He reads from the file, "According to past employers, it in no way affects her job per--- blah blah blah."

In the car, Pam's remark about closure has reminded Michael of Holly, and he talks about how he should go to Nashua some time to get some closure of his own. "Okay, let's go," Pam tells him. But what about the people expecting him at the Rochester branch? "Screw 'em!" Pam says. "Let's do this!" Wow, closure makes her kind of euphoric. Michael considers it, chuckles, and...to be continued.

Well, not quite. In the tag, Jim tells Creed that he's collecting thee dollars from everyone for Kelly's party. Creed obligingly reaches into his wallet and hands over a three-dollar bill. Better ask him for five next time, Jim. That way you'll get at least one legit bill.

M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter (mgiant), or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.

The desk jockeys of The Office sure endure a lot of humiliation. Lucky for them they've got us to count them down with our The Office: Most Embarrassingly Roast-able Moments gallery.