So they walk into Michael's office and tell him that he's clean, even making up elaborate stories about how they had their Fed and cop friends do a background check. "He's just a pushy salesman," Andy says. Gosh, that's almost a believable story. Michael's now pissed at Grotti for making him think he was mafia.

Michael gets Grotti on the phone, with Dwight and Andy there in the office with him to listen. Michael kind of goes off on Grotti, to the point where Andy and even Dwight are telling him to dial it back. After Michael finishes reading him the riot act, Grotti pleasantly invites him to call back if he changes his mind. But when he hangs up, the guys congratulate him for standing up to the mob. "I should be mad at you guys," he says. But he's not. Now he can go out into the bullpen and brag about how he faced down the mob. And then he demandingly orders Erin out to get him coffee, threatening to send it back if it's not just right. Wow, I never thought Dwight and Andy could pull if off, but they did it; they made Michael even more impossible to live with.

Kevin gets Pam on the phone, and she answers with, "Are you kidding me?" She says that they're on their honeymoon, having to deal with their credit cards being cancelled, so she's not in the mood for this. As opposed to before, when she was so sweet to Oscar. Kevin just tells her to say hi to Jim, and Pam sarcastically promises to make it her top priority. After hanging up, Kevin relaxes. "They have no idea what happened," he says. He loves a happy ending.

M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter , or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.