Ryan's fixing his own lunch in the break room, when Dwight comes in to say there's still five feet of sub left. "Someone ate three feet of that thing?" Ryan marvels disgustedly. Dwight takes the ice cream cake out of the freezer. Angela comes and tries to take it from him, but Dwight refuses, saying he can't risk anything going wrong. Dropping his voice, he asks Angela about the "meeting" later to "discuss finances," he adds, cutting his eyes at Ryan. Angela says yes. "But don't expect any cookie," she whispers back. In the background, Ryan looks up in alarm. And Angela leaves, emphasizing that no matter how hungry Dwight may be there will be no cookie.
Ryan. Is it still a TH if the head doesn't talk, but only gazes around in mute horror?
At the grocery store, Pam acts surprised when Jim picks up a jug of fabric softener. I would have pegged him as a dryer-sheet guy too.
At the bullpen, Dwight presents the birthday ice-cream cake while everyone sings "Happy Birthday," with Michael harmonizing. But at the end, Kevin's cell phone rings, and Dwight finishes the song alone while everyone listens for news. "Respect the birthday, please?" Michael bitches at Kevin, and Kevin hangs up. "It was just Daisy," Kevin says. No news, in other words. Michael blows out his candles, and is disappointed when they don't light again. Of course he fails to get that when you're expecting trick candles, normal candles are trick candles. Well, that, plus nobody cares. Noticing that Meredith is giving Kevin a hug, Michael asks why he isn't getting any. Angela flatly tells him, "No one cares about your birthday. Kevin's waiting to hear if he has skin cancer." The camera zooms in on Michael's devastated face. When he recovers, he says, "That's terrible. Terrible news for both of us." And the he carries his cake into the office and slams the door. For someone who's wanted to be the center of attention all day, he certainly handled the last ten seconds poorly.
Jim and Pam get to the cash register, but nobody is there. Jim dares Pam to make an announcement into the unattended microphone, and she comes up with the following, complete with Darth Vader voice: "Luke! This is your father! Come set the table for dinner!" Eventually, a humorless store employee chases her away while Jim acts all embarrassed by her antics.
Kevin is talking to Toby about the terrible Dunder Mifflin health plan (again, I'm linking to that episode) when Michael excitedly interrupts with some encouraging survivability stats for skin cancer that he just got off the internet. Stupid internet. "It's still scary," Kevin says. But since Kevin has a one-in-fifty chance of living into the third season, Michael wants to go ahead with the fun. When Toby remarks that nobody's really in the mood, Michael "invites" Kevin to go ahead and take a sick day. "If I go home I'll just drive myself crazy," Kevin protests. Michael snaps that Kevin's already driving everybody else crazy. "...Crazy with worry," he amends unconvincingly.