By the time they're all back at the office, Deangelo has to rush past everyone to the bathroom. That's the whole payoff, although I guess I'm glad we don't have to see him finish the Dundies with wet pants. As everyone gets settled into the conference room with Michael and Deangelo, Michael gives the "Doobie Doobie Pothead Stoner" Award to Andy for trying pot in college. Andy says that of all the people he wants to thank, they all really just want to thank Michael. For everything. Darryl starts playing his keyboard in the back of the room, and Michael realizes, "Oh my God, something's happening." Right here would be enough to make Michael's life, but Andy sits down and starts singing a song to the tune of "Seasons of Love" from Rent:

Nine million nine hundred eighty-six thousand minutes
We actually sat down and did the math.

Everyone else joins in, actually sounding like a decent chorus:

Nine million nine hundred eighty six thousand minutes
That's how many minutes that you worked here.

Now they start taking solos:

In costumes, and impressions, in meetings, and cups of coffee
For birthdays, more meetings, and e-mail forwards you made us read.

Back to chorus mode:

Nine million nine hundred eighty six thousand minutes
That's like watching Die Hard eighty thousand times.

Now more solos, and you can probably guess who sings which line:

"You hit me with your car." "You helped me get off drugs."
"I watch you when you sleep." "I forgive you for kissing me."

Everyone stands for the big finish, and Michael is getting choked up when Deangelo of all people brings it home at the end as they sing the "remember to call" ending. It's all so dorky and embarrassing and perfectly calculated to sock Michael right in the soul. After all that, he does a heartfelt TH in his office, clearly emotionally affected: "Yeah, okay. Well, this is gonna hurt like a motherfucker."

The tag is a moment from the restaurant ceremony, where Deangelo is reading the cue card for Toby's "Extreme Repulsiveness" award. "Oh, that's so mean," he editorializes afterwards. Toby refuses to go, and it takes Oscar and Jim encouraging him to suck it up. Toby's speech is about how he disagrees with it and thinks it's kind of hateful, "Although I am a little happy right now to have a platform to talk about the outcome of a case that I was recently a juror on, the Scranton Strangler. A man's being put to death, I was part of the verdict, and I'm not so sure he's guilty." Dwight interrupts him with an "Ohhh yeah (chick-chicka)" synth cue. Thanks, Toby, you've given us all something to think about.