David Wallace doesn't fire Andy for being AWOL for three months, but it's not going to take much more after this. Andy's got bigger things to worry about, though; his grief over being dumped by Erin. He snoops around on her phone and that's how he finds out she's dating Pete, which he unsurprisingly does not take well. In fact, he tries to fire Pete and gets pretty mad when Toby won't let him. Then Pete and Erin give Andy a little lecture about how they know this is hard for him, but he needs to move on. And yes, Andy's a jerk, but maybe that speech could have waited a day… or maybe even an hour. Andy doesn't take it lying down, though; he hires Pete's ex and sets her up next to him in the annex and then hires Erin's ex: Gabe. Awkwardness and even ugliness ensues, just as Andy intended.
Dwight's got a slovenly old Aunt Shirley and he drafts Angela into helping him clean her. To hear Dwight tell, it's a job not unlike mucking out a stable. Angela, however, insists on doing the job properly and respectfully, which impresses Dwight so much that by the end of the episode they end up in each other's arms. But only briefly, as she's still got her marriage to the Senator to think about -- such as it is.
Nellie finally grows weary enough of listening to Toby faff on about the Scranton Strangler that she yells at him to either do something about it or shut up already. So Toby ends up going to the prison to tell the convicted man that he believes he's innocent. He gets partially strangled for his trouble, but Nellie is grudgingly impressed. It probably helps that he can't talk any more for a while.
Pam travels to Philadelphia for an interview at a real estate company, only to discover that the boss there is a virtual clone of Michael Scott, and he expects her to be the Receptionist. Jim and Pam laugh about it afterwards, but when she finally sacks up and says she likes Scranton, the laughter ends in a hurry.
And it doesn't come back at the end, in a silly epilogue whose only worthwhile development is a pop-up ad on Oscar's screen advertising an upcoming documentary called The Office. So perhaps we'll finally get some answers about this whole thing. You know, like at the end of Lost.
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Everyone in the bullpen can hear David Wallace in the conference room, yelling at a freshly shorn Andy for lying to him about being in the office when he was off sailing for three months. Not to mention the even more egregious lie represented by that terrible wig they stuck on Ed Helms last week. Andy actually has the nerve to yell back at Wallace, accusing him of lying as well. But then he admits it's been tough. "Erin just dumped me, and I can't remember any of the 'A-ha' moments I had on the boat and I know it sounds weird to say, but I really miss my beard." Wallace calms down and says he's not going to fire Andy, who is the reason Wallace owns the company. Like that's such a big favor. "We are even now, understand?" He adds that Andy's on thin ice. "Vanilla," Andy says, clarifying, "Vanilla Ice. He was a band." And the ice gets even thinner.
New, expanded, full-length credits, because we're into this show for a full hour tonight. Even Old Salty's back to get knocked off Andy's desk again.
Andy shows up in the morning and tries to offer Erin his usual cheerful if dorky greeting, which he can't get through before locking himself - weeping -- in his office with the blinds closed. That goes to a crying-head in which Andy takes a moment to compose himself and explains, "Last week, Erin told me that our relationship will be proceeding without me." And it's been hard seeing her in the office every day. It also appears to be hard for the employees, who have to listen to his keening even through his closed office door. As Pete shows up for the day, he and Erin make a big show of not talking to each other. Erin THs that they've been keeping their new relationship quiet out of consideration for Andy's feelings. And also because it's hotter that way. "I mean I saw Pete's butt," she says, so we know she hasn't gone completely wanton.
Pam's THs about how she's got an interview at a real estate company in Philly today, which explains the power suit, as well as the resume she pulls quickly off the network printer. It fills nearly a quarter of the page.
Dwight's on the phone to Mose, apparently trying to talk him through the care and feeding of some difficult piece of livestock, specifically their aunt. Cut to him ambushing Angela in the break room, jumping out from behind a vending machine. He tells her he needs her help with cleaning up his terminally ill Aunt Shirley. Angela seems sympathetic and then suspicious when Dwight admits that the nurse they hired for her got "poisoned" and quit. He's calling in the favor Angela owes him, saying there's parts of Aunt Shirley he doesn't even recognize, like "a prehensile wing or something... there's a divot where it was, and it needs a..." Angela would rather leave and get this over with than have to listen to any more.