The Office
New Guys

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M. Giant: C+ | Grade It Now!
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The Long Goodbye

Dwight returns to his desk to warn Jim that the new guys are after their jobs. Jim just winds Dwight up even further by claiming that the new guys called a sales meeting, and Clark gave a karate demonstration at the end. "Did you know there was a belt above black? It's a color you would never expect."

Angela makes an announcement that she'll be holding interviews for someone to adopt Comstock, like it's such a get. "You're in this, but you need to wow me," she warns Pam.

In Andy's office, he informs Nellie that their working relationship is "going to be terrible." "Not necessarily," Nellie says naively, so Andy clarifies that he's going to make sure of it. "I don't like to throw around the B-word, but I'm gonna be a huge bitch to you."

Andy has everyone outside for a "slack-line" demonstration, clearly designed to humiliate Nellie and Toby. For those not familiar with the skill, it's basically tightrope walking, but with a looser strap instead of a wire, a few feet off the ground. While watching Andy's Outward Bound counselors "Feather" and "Rafe" perform, Jim tries to find common ground with Pete, who likes none of the same sports Jim likes. "I have nothing in common with Plop," Jim THs conclusively, somehow making me laugh against all odds.

Andy calls Nellie up onto the slack line, high heels and all, supporting her up there until he flings her face-first onto the pad. Darryl declines to participate, saying, "Seems like the kind of thing white people with dreadlocks do." Driving by Lake Calhoun near my house, I can absolutely confirm that.

Dwight, Jr. agrees to take a crack at it, and nails it on the first try. "My doctor says I have gigantic inner ears," he THs by way of explaining his otherworldly balance. Dwight boos him, and falls off quickly when he tries to go himself. "Who ordered the hot apple fail?" Andy tools. That's just the beginning of a montage of spectacular falls courtesy of Dwight. At the end of which, Andy declares it official: "Old Dwight is lame and new Dwight is cool." "That's not true!" Dwight protests through a mouthful of blood. Toby finally calls a halt to this as Dwight claims he'd be embarrassed to be good at this and storms off. I guess this season might turn out interesting after all, if only to find out what happens when Toby kind of does his job sometimes.

Later, in the warehouse, Dwight is mocking the concept of a slack line while dismantling a bicycle and a folding table, to be recombined into some misbegotten hybrid of the two.

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The Office

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