"What about office romance?" Meredith asks. Toby says that's "never a good idea." But if one happens, it needs to be disclosed to HR. "All relationships?" Phyllis asks. "Even a one-night stand?" When Phyllis says this, Jim is in the foreground, and he does perhaps my favorite lip-pursing eye-boggle in the history of the show, because it's one part "whaaaaat?" and one part "go Phyllis!" Michael says, apropos of nothing, that he believes in "the honor system," and that he's never slept with an employee. "And believe me, I could have." Dwight thinks that Michael means Meredith (natch), but it turns out he's referring to someone else. Someone who most likely fled the jurisdiction.
In a TH, Jim says he's actually in an office relationship himself. Do we want to meet the girl? We do? Great. He drags the blow-up doll into the frame, but he is absolutely stunned to see that she isn't wearing anything. "Oh my God, put on a shirt!" he tells her. "I'm sorry, she's European," he says to us as the blow-up doll turns toward him. She keeps trying to nuzzle his neck, and he keeps pushing her away. I think that blow-up doll hangs out on the internet.
"What if Pam was a lesbian?" Michael asks. Hard to imagine how this could go wrong. Michael proceeds to ask hypothetical questions about Pam's potential partner, and about Pam making out with her, and about everyone gossiping about it. Pam looks like she might off herself. Michael suggests that she act out this scenario with the doll, and it's safe to say that's...not happening. For a rare change of pace from her usual expression of fury, Pam's mouth actually hangs open here. I think it was the part where he threw in the doll.
"Crossing The Line: Rules For The Modern Workplace" is the name of the video that apparently must now be shown, perhaps because Michael is having trouble keeping his lesbian fantasies to himself. Michael, Darryl, and Roy are watching in the conference room, along with one or two other folks. Michael goes out into the office to invite everyone. There are no takers. Not surprising, since I think watching a sexual harassment video is what they make you do in hell. Historical note: "That's what she said" makes its first creaky appearance when Michael trots it out after both Jim's "no thanks; I'm good" and Pam's "my mother's coming." (...Eeeeew.)
And now, Dwight sits on the edge of Toby's desk. He mentions that Toby told them they could come to him with questions. Dwight has a question. He hesitates. "Where is the clitoris?" he finally asks. Toby freezes. Dwight continues in a deadly serious semi-whisper: "On a web site it said at the crest of the labia. What does that mean?" Toby blinks a couple of times. "What does the female vagina look like?" Dwight finishes. Hey, say what you will about Dwight, but at least he knows what he's supposed to be looking for. In a TH, Toby points out that...well, he is in "human resources," after all. "I'm just sad the public school system failed him so badly." And then we return to his discussion with Dwight, in which Toby gently says, "Maybe when you feel comfortable with each other, you can ask for that." I'm glad they didn't tell me. Toby needs to get back to work.