The Office
The Office

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 471 USERS: B
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Perfect Pork Anus

Dwight is selecting his team, which still does not include Jim. And yet, while he's wandering the office taking cell phone pictures of his candidates, Jim gets a mysterious text from Robert California saying, "Bring your clubs to Florida." He's about to text back a pair of question marks, but Pam's getting her editor on, telling him to just send one. Jim gives us the look he used to give us when dealing with Michael.

Dwight has presented his list to Andy: Darryl, Phyllis, Toby, Angela and Oscar. Andy offers, "Someone less essential? Like a Creed or a Meredith perhaps?" Anyway, Andy assigns his own team: Darryl and Phyllis are fine, but Kathy, Kelly and Kevin are coming too. That's a lot of Ks, plus isn't Kathy just Pam's temporary replacement? For someone who has a made-up job in the first place? Dwight complains about having a chain with three weak links. "Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have. And now I no longer own an Arctic Wolf."

We catch up with the Halperts in the break room, where Pam is micromanaging the text Jim's sending back to Robert. But then he thinks he should just call. "You're going to call someone that texted you?" Do you want to drive him away?" wails Kelly's entire pathology from the next table.

Darryl gets a call from a guy who wants to send his girlfriend in the warehouse flowers. Yep, that would be Val. Darryl takes this latest blow even more poorly than the earlier one.

Dwight stands up and brusquely summons his team into the conference room, and when he says it's for a business trip to Florida, the ones who aren't going don't take it well. "Why does [Kathy] even still work here?" Meredith asks, marking one of the very few times Meredith speaks for me. Dwight says that Andy (who is shut up in his office right now) had his own reasons for deciding who was most deserving of "this boondoggle of a lifetime," and knocks on Andy's door to have him come out and explain his picks. Andy tries to demur, and Angela calmly points out that the people chosen to go were obviously the least important to the office. We learn that Andy says "guys" a lot when he's nervous, and he says that he and Dwight picked them out. Dwight throws Andy right back under that bus, saying he had his own picks that Andy overruled. Stanley is still pissed about being passed over. "I'm the only person in this office who watches Burn Notice!" Yeah, even I don't watch that any more. Now that he knows so many people want to go, Andy announces that he's willing to hear them out. Dwight agrees that everyone should take five to six hours to come up with a statement, but Andy gets him down to thirty minutes. Which is a much more reasonable use of everyone's time.

The Office

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