The Office
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Perfect Pork Anus

The bullpen is decorated for Valentine's Day like it's a kindergarten classroom rather than an office, when not one but two Halperts show up for the day. Yep, Pam's back from maternity leave. She barely gets to enjoy her moment before the entrance of none other than Angela, four days after having her baby (much to Dwight's consternation, although he seems to be a little more discreet than he was last week). Angela whips off her coat, revealing a perfect figure, and unveils the brownies and cookies she brought fro everyone. Of course this all makes Pam feel fat and useless and stupid (which of course is Angela's entire intent), but not enough to decline a brownie. Pam starts diving into her purse for some cash for everyone, but Jim wisely puts the kibosh on that.

Short credits, and then Andy has Dwight in his office, trying to draw out an exciting announcement. Dwight has no time for this game: "If you make me head of Sales one more time, I swear..." Instead, Andy breaks the news that Dwight has been chosen to go to Tallahassee to help launch a line of Sabre stores. Dwight does an entire karate routine of shouted Yeses, and a TH about how he's in a state of what the Schrutes call perfektenschlag, in which everything is working perfectly. It also translates to "perfect pork anus," but that's not what he means.

At Reception, Erin and Andy exchange a fax and some facts before Erin points out that they're wearing matching flashing heart pins. Of course, when Andy says his was from Jessica, Erin loses interest, and throws hers in the trash as soon as Andy steps away. Bitter Erin is a little off-putting.

Darryl enters his office to find knitted stocking cap on his desk, from Val. But as he says in a TH, he doesn't know whether it was a friend gift or a romantic one. So now, to clarify "the meaning of the beanie," Darryl plans to give her a really romantic gift. Hard to see how this could go wrong.

Dwight tells Pam she'll be joining him in Tallahassee, but Jim's not invited. "Does this have anything to do with what you were talking to Andy about?" Pam asks. Dwight: "God, you're such a spy!"

Down in the warehouse, Darryl presents himself to Val proudly wearing the beanie, only to look around and see that everyone in the warehouse is wearing one. "It's like the Nation of Islam down here," he says. Now Darryl is facing the issue of what to do with the silver-wrapped romantic gift he has in his hand. He ends up handing it off to the half-deaf warehouse guy, who I finally figured out is named Nate. He tells him to open it later, but Nate rips open a pair of cashmere gloves with a note, "I'm glad you're in my life." And now there's the issue of what to get Val. "Can't wait," she says.

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