Michael offers a final voice-over to wrap up everything he's learned in the city of brotherly love: he says that some people need a ton of friends to feel popular, but that Michael's more picky. He says that when you meet someone special, you know. (Michael tries to push the buttons on the plush Blackberry, at which the guy bats his hands away.) A real relationship can't be forced. (Michael grins at Bettis, who watches Michael hurry off and does not plan to attend his party.) "It should come about effortle-lessly," Michael concludes, with his usual saggiosacity.
After commercials, Michael tests out his blacklight with Dwight. In addition to the blue glow of their teeth (and Michael's fun jeans), the light reveals splashes and puddles and spatter everywhere. Michael asks what they are, and Dwight says that they're either blood, urine, or semen. Michael: "God, I hope it's urine." There's that Scranton optimism again.