Convention floor. Josh tells Michael that he and Jim need to head out for their meeting with Uniball, but Michael points out a contest to fly a paper airplane through a hoop, and suggests, "A little friendly competition? Stamford versus Scranton!" Josh begs off, and Michael teases Jim that he "picked a bad time to defect." Jim looks at Josh, chuckling, and Josh agrees. Michael is starting to fold his plane when his cell phone rings. He picks it up: "Hey, Pam." The camera zips over to Jim, who tries to look away as Michael tells Pam to tell someone that Michael will give him "general specifics" the next day. He holds out his phone and calls, "Say hi to Pam!" Jim stares at the phone like he thinks it might be about to steal his soul, but he, like Josh and Dwight, manages to blurt, "Hi, Pam." Michael puts the phone back up to his ear, saying who it was. "Pam says hi!" Michael reports. To her, he adds, "Have fun on your date." The camera fucking zoooooooooms in on Jim's face as his eyebrows crinkle and he goes all red. Michael hangs up. Jim swallows his heart and snaps out of it.
And back in Scranton, Pam apparently reacts to the sound of Jim's name with just as much calm and equanimity. I kind of can't believe she doesn't just call up this Alan and cancel her date right there and then.
Philadelphia. Josh throws his plane and hits the rim. Michael goes next and doesn't get it past his own feet. I mean, to be fair, he was on the phone when he was folding his plane. Would you want to ride in a plane where the engineer was on the phone while he was building it? Michael tries to be all "double or nothing," but Josh pleasantly reminds him that they didn't bet on it, besides which, he needs to leave. Michael tries to goad him into a repeat, but Josh blows him off and leaves with Jim. Michael yearningly watches them leave, and once they're gone, the Hammermill salesman buttonholes Michael to give him his sales pitch.
In his room, surrounded by swag, Michael inter-mopes that he and Jim have "different definitions of friendship." He thinks it's "talking and being friends," whereas Jim thinks it's "moving to Connecticut and being best friends with Josh." Michael declares that he won't be speaking with Jim anymore: "Long-distance relationships never work." From offscreen, we hear a voice say, "That is so true." The camera widens out so we can see that the Hammermill guy is sitting on Michael's bed, fruity drink in hand, still waiting to deliver his pitch -- which, now that Michael's vented about Jim, Michael's ready to hear.