Jim begs Pam to "ask Michael." He doesn't say what about, though she obviously knows. She's reluctant, preferring to watch Dwight practice his fighter moves on Kevin. Finally, he offers to buy her chips. "French onion?" she asks. "Obviously," he replies. No can defend! She relents. She goes to Michael's door and knocks. When Michael answers, she says that since she's going to stay late, she was wondering if Michael could make Dwight stay late too, so that he can walk Pam to her car. Michael bites on the bait quite predictably, calls her in, and says Dwight isn't "tough enough" to protect her. Pam points out that Dwight is a purple belt: "That's really high." Michael claims he could take Dwight. When Pam makes an "innocent" remark about how that's kind of...you know...different from life "out there," Michael can take no more, knowing they're all saying he's weak, so he goes to find Dwight. As Michael strolls down the hall looking for Dwight, Jim falls in behind him, doing West Side Story's downward-snap dance. It's a beautiful, tiny little touch. Michael finds Dwight in the break room, where he's training Kelly in self-defense. "Now watch," he tells her. "Let me take you from behind!" Kelly: "What?" Michael says that she'd better be careful -- Dwight tends to sucker-punch. Dwight denies it. Things escalate, with Michael insisting that he absorbed one punch, as he said he would, and then Dwight punched him again, in violation of their agreement. Dwight offers Michael two punches, and Michael says maybe if they were in a bar, and then they're off. Pump...pump...pump...and then Jim suggests that they fight in Dwight's dojo. After shooing away an unsuspecting Toby, who walks into the middle of this smackdown and seems only too happy to slink right back out, Michael agrees that at lunch, they will fight. At the dojo. Fight! Fight! Fight! "Pam," Michael says darkly, "Make an announcement. Figure out carpools." Release the hounds!
Jim, in his coat, THs that while the Albany branch works through lunch to avoid downsizing, Michael has expanded lunch so that everyone can go watch him and Dwight beat on each other. "Fight! Fight! Fight!" he chants happily, and then he actually gets dragged away in the middle of the TH to get in, presumably, his carefully arranged carpool. I think the only thing that makes Jim feel warmer in his heart than being able to unleash unexpected generosity is the prospect of Michael and Dwight hitting each other.
At the dojo, Michael admires some writing on the wall and announces that it's Japanese for "California roll." Ira the sensei tells him it's actually a symbol for "eternal discipline." Michael is unconvinced, probably because he's never been to a restaurant that serves eternal discipline. Elsewhere, Jim reads Pam's palm. Except that she has a giant self-defense glove (like a flat boxing glove) on, so he can't see anything. She urges him to look closer, and when he leans down, she bops him on the nose. This leads to poking in the forehead, which leads to sparring, which leads to wrestling, which leads to Jim picking Pam up with his arms around her waist from behind, and as her shirt slides up, she spots Meredith, who's watching. "Oh my God, put me down," she says more sharply, embarrassed by being seen, and then she gives an angry "Hey." He looks stunned as he abruptly drops her, and she walks off. He looks, for just a second, like he might actually burst into tears.