Pam excitedly interviews that she can't wait to see what Dwight has planned. She adds that she wishes Jim were here. I guess she's been trained not to know that something's funny unless he's there to shrug at the camera.
Corporate. David asks what Michael thinks the company could be doing better. Michael says he isn't crazy about the name "Dunder Mifflin," and suggests, as alternatives, "Paper Great," or "Great Paper's Our Passion," or "Super Duper Paper." David's like, "Okay! Get out." At the door, Michael tells David that he and Jan have gotten back together, so he may need to sign another one of those "love documents." David uncomfortably tells Michael that the job he's just interviewed for is Jan's; they're letting Jan go. Eh, all she'd have to do is come to the office in a scoop-necked sweater and she could turn that around, no problem.
Scranton. Strap in: it's time for Origins of Paper, the class you would never take in a million years. Dwight very energetically talks about topsoil and nitrogen, asking Stanley about whether rainfall occurs in a solid, liquid, or gaseous state. Stanley answers "liquid" (which is correct, by the way), and Dwight gravely tells him he's earned one Schrute Buck. Stanley drawls, "I don't want it." Dwight yells that he's been fined fifty Schrute Bucks, then, and Stanley sighs, "Make it a hundred." "You don't want to earn Schrute Bucks?" asks Dwight, wounded. Stanley says that he'll give Dwight a billion Stanley Nickels never to speak to him again. Dwight asks the ratio of Stanley Nickels to Schrute Bucks. Stanley: "The same as the ratio of unicorns to leprechauns." Ah -- 5:2. Andy tries to punish everyone by abruptly dismissing the meeting, but Pam quiets the pandemonium by loudly ordering everyone to listen to Dwight's presentation. He gives her a huge wink, which Oscar notices, earning him his second "zip your lid" of the day. Maybe he's trying to get that to catch on.
Corporate. It's Karen's turn with David. She winds up her five-year plan (which I'm sure was just fascinating), and then David asks her what she thinks of Michael Scott. Karen diplomatically says that he's "a very nice man," and is "very well-suited for the job he has now." David assures her that this will be off the record. Karen: "He would be a disaster." David couldn't figure that out on his own? "Super Duper Paper"?
Michael walks stiffly out of his interview, every muscle completely tense. He comes past Jan's office and she waves him in, asking how the interview went. He says that it could have gone better, and she gives him a big kiss, telling him she'll put in a good word for him. Michael chokes that she should do that sooner than later, and then starts babbling that they should run away to Jamaica: "You have some savings, right? You could pay off my debts." Jan starts to get concerned, asking what happened in the interview, and Michael says he can't tell her. But the way he starts hyperventilating, it's pretty clear that if he even has a Vault, she's got the key. And it's in her bra.