Michael invites everyone into the conference room in his typical pre-performance flop-sweat fashion, for "The official Merger Day All-Family Welcome Breakfast." I think that needs more words. As everyone files in around the conference table with a spread so sad that the current employees aren't allowed to touch it, Toby tries to give Michael some orientation binders. "This is an orientation, not a bore-ientation," Michael zingers. Every once in a while, he gets off a good one. Sitting next to Pam at the table, Jim makes a comment she returns. And sitting behind Jim, Karen passes Jim a stick of gum. So there's more than one pissing contest going on here today. Michael introduces the Scranton orientation video, the famous "Lazy Scranton." If you haven't seen it, I don't know how I'm going to help you, but if you can imagine the SNL short "Lazy Sunday" as adapted by two even whiter guys (namely Michael and Dwight) with even less rhythm and the words changed to talk about Scranton, you're pretty much there. Jim stares open-mouthed at the monitor, Karen's gum clearly visible floating around in there. Andy nods appreciatively to the beat, much to Jim's amazement. Jim THs, "It reminds me of the orientation video Michael showed me on my first day: "The Scranton Witch Project." Which we even get to see a snippet of, as Michael sweatily whines in extreme close-up in a darkened break room, "I am so scared when people don't label their personal food." Back to "Lazy Scranton," as Michael comes out into the bullpen to tell us, "I thought it would either be an A or an A-plus. But I forgot that there is an A-Plus-Plus." Ooh, I forgot that too. And I just decided on the episode grade. I can do that, right, Wing? ["I don't know this 'Wing.' F-minus for you! The real answer is, um...no. We don't have A++ in the system. The second plus is silent!" -- Miss Alli]
Karen is trying to record her new outgoing voice mail greeting, and can't get Jim to go away until she agrees to do one in an Italian accent. Fortunately, that works. Sometimes the only difference between Michael and Jim is desperation.
Dwight returns to his desk, and the pissing contest with Andy continues. Andy tries to be all cool, patting Dwight on the shoulder. Dwight of course flinches like a skittish lemur. So Andy makes him do it again. Andy THs, "The angrier he gets, the more marginalized he becomes. Meanwhile, Andy Bernard is out there, layin' on the charm."
And we see that the personality mirroring is not limited to Michael, as Andy (all set up in Oscar's seat, because its current occupant is on his extended gay-cation) shows off his new cowboy kitty-cat screensaver to Angela and compliments her smile. Angela's not smiling. That's the joke.