The sales staff (save Andy) corners Michael in his office, and he asks them the same question he asked Danny: "Do you want your life to be better, or worse, or stay the same?" "Stay the same," they chorus. He says their lives will get better, but Phyllis points out that he'll steal all their clients. Michael says he would have, but he can't now because he'll be working with them as their traveling salesman. Michael actually says something that makes sense: "I am not going to exclude good people from our staff simply because they are threatening to you. And unless you have a better argument than that, I suggest you leave." And since Dwight has nothing but questions about where Danny will sit and where he'll park (both moot as Danny will be traveling), the discussion is over. Even Jim doesn't have a good argument. I suspect he could have talked Michael out of this with a bad argument, and you probably know what that argument is, but even in an episode where Jim called on Michael to help him save a sale and participated in a plot better suited to Three's Company, there are things he still won't do.
Down in the warehouse, Darryl is asking Andy what he really cares about, preferably something more universal than "reverse snobbery.". "Sometimes I feel like life has passed me by," Andy admits. Darryl gets him started on a song that might actually be a song, even if it's a little corny, and just when Andy's about to ask Darryl how much he'll charge for another half hour, Darryl tells him not to worry about it. "So we're just, like, jamming as friends?" Andy asks excitedly. Darryl's only answer is to count off. If Darryl's character is going to keep going in this direction, Andy's going to have to call his band Magical Negro.
Up in the bullpen, Danny casually informs Jim, "Your wife and I went on a few dates." Jim kids like it's news to him, and Danny remarks that Pam wasn't into him. Well, either one of them is wrong, or there was a miscommunication somewhere. Which means unresolved whatever, which I don't think is going to be resolved in the few minutes left in the episode. "You snubbed her," Dwight hisses at Danny, and quickly warms to his subject as Pam wanders in behind him. "You probably thought that Pam was too meh, or thin without being toned, but I want to tell you something: she is one of the plain, hearty women of Scranton that make this city great. And so what if she doesn't wear makeup? We like her better that way." Neither Jim nor Pam seem sure how to react to this bolt from the blue, except for how Pam mouths to us, "I wear makeup!" "And you steal clients, don't you?" Dwight snaps. Danny says that's a different issue, but Dwight presses it and calls Danny a thief. "In fact, where are my keys? Oh, they're in my pocket. False alarm." That kind of took the wind out of his sails, to the extent that Dwight welcomes Danny aboard. Jim quietly asks Dwight, "Hey, crazy...so you're fine?" Dwight says it's five o'clock and he's not going to take it home. He shakes Danny's hand and heads out. Guy's got a beet farm, a bed & breakfast, and an office park to run, after all.
Michael smugly says in his office that Danny stole a sale from him, so he stole Danny. "The sale that mattered, I made." He laughs at the irony, adding, "We don't even need him, we've already got Packer on the road... Crap, I forgot about Packer." Finally, a healthy response from Michael on the subject of Packer, even it's for the wrong reasons.
The tag is Andy's band performing some goofy novelty song about froggy love. I'm not getting into it.
M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter , or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]gmail.com.