After the ads, Pam and Dwight act all happy to see her, but Jan was clearly expecting David Wallace. Dwight tries to be charming with a photo of Jan's daughter Astrid while Pam explains how Wallace is in Vermont. Jan angrily yells for Molly, who panic-babbles about how it got confusing with her instructions not to tell anyone Jan's name, plus how hard it is to hear on the Bluetooth Jan makes her wear. Jan is clearly let down, while Dwight deploys his creepy nod/smile and Pam realizes Jan has no intention of buying from them. "Insightful, Pam," Jan winks. Defeated, Pam tries to get Dwight out of there, but Dwight says they're not going anywhere. "You keep her occupied. I'll be right back." Pam bravely asks Jan is there are any other pictures of Astrid, and Jan reluctantly agrees, "I will show you one... slideshow."
At the office, Erin is finding herself pretty put off by Pete's mustache. "It makes it look like there's an eyebrow in the middle of your face," she apologizes. "A handsome eyebrow, but, um, it makes your mouth looks like an eye socket...you look like a Cyclops whose eye fell out. Which is great! It's such a great cause!" Cut to Pete coming out of the bathroom with a razor, shaving cream, and a bald lip. Fuck those prostates, man.
Pam sits through a video slideshow, whose soundtrack consists of Jan herself singing a song about how Astrid thinks she's the greatest. Pam accidentally finds herself in a one-upping match with Jan, which she finally loses on purpose, though not without some effort. "Don't patronize me," Jan snaps. "I'm so sorry, I hate this, you're better," Pam concedes in a panic.
Angela wants to leave the health club, but Oscar wants to see more of what's going on with Robert and the yoga instructor. Angela suddenly accuses Oscar of getting his jollies. Oscar tells Angela this could be the affair she's worried about: "Politicians are wonderful liars. You never know who they really are," he says with a little too much passion. Off Angela's alarmed look, he assures her, "But, uh, he's probably not gay. He's straight. He's straight, so." Well, now we know why Oscar never went into politics.