As we see Michael fake-driving through the "rain," Stanley narrates that with the game three days away and all sold out, the only way Scarn could get in was in a uniform. So he goes to learn to play hockey from "Cherokee Jack." At the Scranton skating rink, "Cherokee Jack" (Creed in a buckskin jacket) makes Scarn mop the ice. Training montage set to Billy Joel's "Running on Ice " (don't worry, I never heard it before either), while three Dave Barry page-a-day calendar sheets flutter to the floor. At the end of this time, Scarn gets to trade his mop for a hockey stick and shoot goals.
Now there's a trial for the one civilian amateur who gets to play in the All-Star game. It's down to three people: Scarn, Oscar in a speedskating leotard, and another guy in a shiny black bodysuit and hockey mask. Ryan (with obvious season-seven hair) gets ready to start the race, but when he's about to say "go," the guy with the hockey mask raises it and hisses, "Die!" Oh, no! It's Goldenface! He and Michael shoot at each other through the whole race (with Billy Joel's better-known "Pressure" playing). Both antagonists somehow survive the gunfight, but Goldenface's real plan has worked: the medal went to Oscar. "By the way, how's your wife doing?" Goldenface mocks. So then Scarn heroically goes into the locker room and strangles Oscar with an American flag. Things get pretty quiet in the screening room right around this point.
Back at Scarn Manor, Samuel "intercepts" a name on the computer: Jasmine Windsong, someone who works for Goldenface. There's also something about "The Funky Cat," which Scarn says is "The hippest jazz club in town." This really isn't any worse than how clues turn up on computers in real movies or TV shows, plus there's the benefit of our not having to sit through a boring explanation of how it came up. Scarn gets up and hands his tea to Samuel, none too carefully. Dwight starts to emote a cyborg freak-out as the liquid spills down his front. Robot butler, remember?