The Office

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Take This Job and Shove Michael

Unearthly roars drift out of Michael's office. Without turning around or even looking up, Jim instantly figures out what's going on and calls behind him, "It's Monster Dot Com. Singular." "Thank you," Michael calls back. Then we see him boasting about how being in the industry for as long as he has means you get to know the players. So he calls Prince Paper. But the only answer is a recording of Mr. Prince saying in a shaky voice that after 40 years they're out of business. "Bye!" adds his granddaughter. Michael crosses "Prince Paper" off his list, which now leaves "other companies." In a TH, Michael rather worriedly says that he doesn't know what he's going to do. Oh, come on, Michael, you're only halfway through your list.

Michael summons Jim into his office as obnoxiously as possible and tells him he's going to start his own paper company, since that's what he knows. "Do you know the industry's in decline?" Jim wonders. "I practically invented decline," Michael boasts. He's offering Jim a chance to get in on the ground floor, and Jim stands up and tells Michael what he wants for him: a job "at a company that a) exists, and b) has a salary." Charles comes in and makes Jim feel bad about talking to Michael. I'm sorry, but Charles is kind of an ass.

Pam kneels on the floor, paging through the brick-like copier manual. Dwight appears at her side and offers to translate the German instructions for her, but he can only tell her that a funny little thing that sticks out of the side of the copier is either an incense dispenser or a ceremonial sarcophagus. "My German is pre-industrial and mostly religious," he admits in a TH.

Michael wants Pam to change the company name on an order form from Dunder Mifflin to Michael Scott Paper Company. She's already heard about his new idea from Jim, and advises him to think about this. Unfortunately she does not also advise him against doing something unethical and possibly illegal. "This is a dream that I have had since lunch and I am not giving up on it," he insists. So she ends up letting him borrow her tape so he can alter the order form himself.

Kelly is in the conference room talking to Charles about her schedule, and then Angela enters to pitch some accounting seminar. "Did Michael just let anybody in his office?" Charles wonders. They babble happily in agreement. "I am aware of the effect I have on women," Charles THs. Kelly shoos Angela out and tells Charles, "She's such a special person. She's turning fifty this year."

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The Office

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