The Office

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Schrödinger's Fiancée

Michael returns to his office so he and Erin can break open the "happy" box and start his "happy" video, which is basically just Michael partying with himself. Good thing Erin's there to keep things from getting too...okay, no. She doesn't even object to getting sprayed with champagne.

Pam's still collecting resolutions (although Dwight's not participating, of course), and Andy's is "learn to cook for one." Which, the more he explains how it's not sad, the sadder it gets. Angela's is "Make time for romance! (with the Senator)." Oscar does the obligatory "state senator" tweak, and Dwight, seeing how easy this is, posts one for himself after all: "Meet a loose woman." Meredith? Anything? Andy likes that one so much he changes his to that. Darryl suggests that if they want to meet some ladies, they should hit the bookstore. As he explains in a TH, his resolution is to read more, and if someone else drives he can eat his lunch in the car. "2011 is coming up all Darryl," he gloats.

Michael finds Holly messing with her new phone at her desk, and they go into a whole E.T. routine that threatens to go on forever until Kelly yells at them over the cube wall, "Oh, God, please stop!" Michael shows off his own "indestructible" old phone by breaking it on her desk, just before she gets a call from A.J. that starts with a discussion of which movie he's going to see and ends in "I love you, too." Oh, don't look so surprised.

Out in the bullpen, Michael is wondering to Pam what's going on with Holly. Phyllis offers to talk to her, which Michael doesn't think would work until he remembers, "She's really nice, she'd talk to anybody." He suggests bringing Erin, "To balance you out." Whatever that means.

Darryl, Andy, and Dwight arrive at the bookstore and split up into their various zones. "I got that cutie behind the counter," Darryl says amorously, heading for the middle-aged matron at the info desk. She shows him an e-reader, from which he all but recoils. He works for a paper company, after all. But when he learns it can hold 10,000 books, he busts out with a "Holy shit!"

Andy and Dwight are acting like big dorky nerds upstairs when Darryl shows up with a shopping bag, ready to take off. Dwight gets nosy about what Darryl bought, but Darryl isn't about to reveal to his coworkers that he bought paper's mortal enemy, so he claims to have gotten something else. "Porn," he says. "Pornography. Old-lady, nasty porn." And thanks to Google, I just scored a whole new demographic. Unless I didn't, in which case don't tell me.

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The Office




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