Sharon to camera, "I love animals." She runs down the animals they have in pecking order. Minnie is a little Pomeranian-looking thing who rules the roost, she says. She's top diva. We see Minnie do tricks. "She can do anything." I take that to be less a boast of her talents and more an admission that the dog is totally spoiled and untrained. Maggie is next. Another rat dog. Sharon calls her "heroin chic." Crazy Baby is next. Another rat dog. She's neurotic. Pip is next. The 'tarded jumping dog. "Then we have the gay one," Sharon says. Hee. Martini is the name. Martini Bianco. His gay ass is a Chihuahua. Then comes Puss, the cat. Then Lulu, a weird, grunty guinea pig of a dog. She looks like a seal. Then there's Lola, the bulldog, who is cute and boisterous.
Ozzy throws Lola off a chair. The cushion is ripped to shreds. Pip bounds off with part of the cushion. Ozzy sits on the couch, mumbling some funny thing about wasting money and people thinking they have too many dogs and "we'll throw the cat in just for fun." Ozzy looks at the ruined cushion and dodders out yelling, "Sharon!" Hee.
Jack. Walking through the living room. Sharon tells him that Lola "et the fucking chair." We see Lola, asleep, her tongue sticking out of her mouth. Lola is obviously Jack's dog and he's going to have to try to save her. Sharon says something about how they're going to have to dye Lola pink because if Ozzy comes back and sees her after a weird, out-of-place shot where Ozzy is in the room, because I don't think he's supposed to be in here for this segment, Sharon spies an injured cat outside the back door, saying how lovely it is. Jack is pissed. Sharon says she's just housing the cat until it's well, and then she's going to give it to a cat rescue. Jack says she's going to just end up keeping it, but Sharon denies it. (I don't think this is the cat Kelly called from the pet shop about. Different timeline.) Jack says that their house is dysfunctional. "Hey, excuse me. That fucking chair is dysfunctional," Sharon responds. Hee. Pip is still eating a cushion part like it's a bone. Little retard.