Next time…Sharon tells us that Kelly has a boyfriend. It's Bert, a singer from some band. The whole family is making a fuss, waiting to meet him. Jack tells Kelly what Bert's nickname in his band is. But it's all swear words, because we just hear beeps. Hee. Sharon says that if she were Bert, she'd come meet the parents. Ozzy waves from behind a waterfall in the pool. Sharon then tells us she doesn't think Kelly is coming home tonight. Ozzy mumbles that Sharon shouldn't worry about Kelly with this boy. Jack and Kelly run screaming at each other, and Ozzy yells, "This will end in tears." Then Sharon tells Kelly that she can "get it from kissing him." "For fuck's sake, Mom!" says Kelly. And that's it! See ya next week, when hopefully MTV will get their bleeping captioning working. If any show needs it, this is the one. Seriously, people.