The Outsider

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Outside Looking Out

After lunch, Will's team is coming up with hypothetical chances of assassination success based on various intelligence reports. Tanya doesn't seem to understand the concept, asking where Miles is getting his percentages from. "Uh, data. Remember that?" Miles snaps. Why is everyone on this show so unpleasant? Grant doesn't think they're going to get the second source confirming that Khateb will be at the safehouse in time, which Miles says leaves them less than a fifty percent chance of success, based on all of his made-up hypothetical data. He at least wants "visual confirmation" that Khateb is in the safehouse, which doesn't seem like it should be that difficult to get what with all those Google Maps satellites we've got up in orbit, but Grant says they won't have that either. "Then none of this is real!" Miles exclaims. Tanya points out that none of Miles' reliability quotients and targeting accuracy whatsawhosits are "real" either. Miles has a little hissy fit and says "she doesn't belong here" before storming out. Um, I don't really understand what Tanya did wrong just then. Or why Miles has to be such a dick about it. Or why Tanya hasn't quit this stupid job yet. Or how she got it in the first place. Or why this show is still on the air.

Spangler and Will's lunch is much more relaxed. Spangler explains to Will (and us) what the purpose of this trip is: to gather allies in the intelligence community that will help them keep API "fully independent." They'll do this by explaining to the intelligence agencies they're meeting with that only API can make good and reliable sense out of the information they gather. And Will is the best example of this how, exactly? He's stupid, lazy, slow, refuses to dress or act like a professional, is now like two weeks late giving Spangler that report on Yuri Popovich he said his team could complete in 24 hours, and his hair is a freaking joke. What about that black lady I always see in Kale's office when he's handing out the day's assignments to the team leaders (you know, the meeting that Will always stumbles into late)? She seems like a much better choice. With that, some old white guy walks in and shakes hands with Spangler, who introduces the man to Will as "an old friend of mine" because he doesn't actually know the guy's real name, such a player in the intelligence community is this man. The guy proves himself to be a moron, as he was apparently a fan of one of Will's reports on Somalia. Mr. E (geddit?? As in "mystery??" I am so clever) proudly says that Spangler doesn't know his real name, and he came to his wedding. Yeah? Well, we all went to the wedding of Maxwell Smart and Agent 99 on Get Smart, and we didn't find out her real name then, either. So don't think you're that special, Mr. E. The best part of this meeting, though, is that as soon as Spangler and Mr. E sit down at the table, they tell Will to get lost.

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