Credits. Okay. I'll make a trade with DEK. I'll stop whining about how bad the theme song is if he gives me Scott Cohen in return for Hunky D.A. Hey, DEK, do we have a deal?
How would one recap David Blaine's Vertigo? Oh, look; he's standing on top of a building. Yes. He's standing. Okay. He's standing some more. Wait! He wobbled. Nope. He's just standing. Oh. He fell. And this show is going to be an hour long? Whatever, ABC -- grab those ratings where you can. It's been a dismal year for you -- and damn you for canceling Philly.
A whole whack of police cars arrives at 1312 Beacon Street. Inside the apartment, a coroner snaps photos of Lawrence O'Malley. Kenneth Walsh walks into the apartment and finds Detective Mike. He says, "O'Malley?" Mike replies, "Three shots." Walsh: "Where are they?" In the bedroom. Mike says, "There's an army in there." Walsh walks into the room and finds Lindsay there, along with her husband, Ellenor, and Jimmy. It's a murder party. Walsh asks, "What happened?" Pause. He looks around. Eugene answers, "We need a few minutes, please." Walsh wonders if everyone is okay. Eugene repeats, "We need a few minutes, please." Walsh reminds Eugene that the bedroom is considered a part of the crime scene. The police will need to come in and take a look around. Eugene says calmly, "No crime was committed, please give us two minutes and we'll be out." The Legacy Of Lindsay whines. Eugene closes the door.
Once it's shut, he insists, "Okay. There is no way you talk." Ellenor says, "Whoa! I know conventional wisdom says don't talk, but here? Given our relationship with Helen?" Where is Baby Rod? You can't tell me he's sleeping peacefully. What did they do with him? He's not in the room with his parents. It's almost as if they've forgotten all about him. Lindsay stares at everyone and doesn't talk. She just sits on the bed holding a pillow. Jimmy contributes, "Helen can't cut this off." Ellenor: "Look, this is exactly the kind of scenario where the conclusion tends to follow the assumption. If we don't cooperate the assumption will be possible murder." I can't believe they are trying to strategize this incident. Open the door, tell the cops what happened, and go on from there. Eugene replies, "The man was unarmed. Three gunshots. They're going to be thinking crime." Ellenor insists, "Possibly, but if we don't talk definitely." Lindsay boils over. She snaps, "Everybody shut up!" Eugene takes control. He says that Lindsay is in shock and that she needs medical attention. Which is probably true. They can use the time that Lindsay is at the hospital to go over exactly what they're going to "give" the police. Eugene continues, "Are we clear?" Bobby nods. Eugene turns toward Lindsay: "I'll get you admitted to the hospital. You'll stay there tonight. Bobby -- you'll stay there with her. We'll have your clothes sent over. When you check out tomorrow you'll come directly to the office. I'll have security at your room." Pause. "Other than the doctor, you'll talk to nobody." Blah walk right out, blah say nothing, blah Eugene will talk to Walsh, blah walk right out blah walking blah. Eugene turns to Ellenor: "You and Jimmy stay behind until they kick you out. We'll need some ears in the room to get a sense of what they're thinking." Who is going to take care of the baby? Why doesn't anyone address the child? I guess the closet is the safest place in the house when your mother is off shooting psychos. Eugene says, "Let's go!"
They open the door to the bedroom. Walsh is waiting on the other side like a kid at Christmas. Eugene confronts him: "Lindsay's in no shape to talk right now. She needs medical attention, we're going to get her to a doctor." Walsh wants to ask her a couple of questions. Eugene replies, "She's in some shock. We'll try to set something up for tomorrow." Detective Mike tries to sneak in a question: "Were you here when it happened, Bobby?" Rod sticks to the plan. He's not going to cave. They're not going to get him. Oh, right. It's only the beginning of the show. We've got two hours of this to look forward to. Rod says, "I need to be with Lindsay." Oh, and by the way, toss the kid in the closet a bottle, will you?