The Practice
This Pud's For You

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Stairway to Heaven

Holding Cell Of Everyday Pain. Well, Lindsay shooting Lannibal Hector can't be the only thing going on. We need some other useless storyline to fill out the season finale. It's a white-knuckle nail-biter for sure this year. Yawn. Rebecca is with her client, Rodney Edsel. He's leaning back on his chair, with his arms behind his head, cackling. Robert Cicchini is the guest star of the week. He's been in a bunch of films -- The Deep End of the Ocean, for one. Rodney says incredulously, "Manslaughter?" Pause. Rebecca tells him to consider the deal. Rodney thinks this is laughable: "Consider it? Consider this!" He grabs his crotch. No, I'm not kidding. Because this is national television, they don't actually show him grabbing his crotch. I mean, this isn't The Sopranos, people. Rodney continues, "They got no body. You can't prove no slaughter without the man." Rebecca insists that the D.A.'s office can prove murder without a body. Pause for The Practice Stereotype #3: Difficult Client. He's in full force this week. Rebecca explains that with the "remnants" of the girl in his car, he's pretty much sunk. Rodney changes the subject: "Well, pet the pud then for luck. We need --" Rebecca interrupts to tell him to stop asking her to "pet the pud." Rodney makes a baby face and says, "Sucky, sucky. Gimme, gimme." Rebecca threatens to remove herself from the case because she's "sick of it." He gets excited -- no, not that kind of excited: "No plea! We're going to win this thing, Rebecca. You, me, and Pugsley. We're a team. Now come on, let's go!" The man refers to his penis as a separate entity. As a, ahem, "member" of a team, with all puns intended. How does DEK sleep at night? Do penises just get up and speak to him? Calling their characters forth?

Whoosh.

The Hospital Where Lindsay Remembers No Pain. Psychiatric Doctor X asks, "You don't remember shooting him at all?" Lindsay says no. She shakes her head: "I remember he said the thing about me going to heaven. Then I --" Pause. "Then I was in my room. Bobby called the police and O'Malley was on the floor." Lindsay looks stricken. She calls out, "Where's my baby? Has anyone seen my baby? Who is taking care of my baby?" Okay, she doesn't call that out. She just sits there staring at the doctor like she can't believe she shot a guy three times in the chest with a gun she'd been carrying around in her purse for three years since the first time she was threatened.

Whoosh.

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The Practice

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