Real World

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: D | 315 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
A Two-Timer Primer

Joe calls the Miami house. Mike explains in voice-over that no one did anything the whole week Joe was gone, except for Sarah and her bagel-tasting expedition. They were slackers, he explains. WE KNOW.

Flora is on the phone, giggling. She's leaving a message for Louis as Mitchell sits like twenty feet away. "I miiiss you! Hugs and kisses." Then Mitchell says, "Honey, can I use the phone, I have to call the girl I'm banging up in Boston." No, he doesn't, but he's thinking it. In a sit-down, Flora explains, "I didn't lie to him. Lying is lying. Not saying is not saying." I hate Flora. Cyn says, "I almost admire the girl," then adds, "You're trying to convince yourself." Flora says, "When you believe yourself, other people believe you." Sarah says, "So you're Madonna, and I believe you!" Hee hee. That Garbage song plays as Mitchell and Flora walk the streets of Miami hand in hand. "I'm only happy when it rains!" And it's raining. Louis drives by in his jeep and totally sees them. Flora drops Mitchell's hand and says, "That was my boss, mmm!" Could she act any more busted?

Flora says, "When I get caught, I think they are both gonna dump my ass." Actually, it's your ass they're most interested in. That's been proven. But let me go get my tiny violin anyway, you poor, poor, two-timing thing. On the phone, Louis says he saw Flora making out with a guy. She totally denies it, all, "Oh, you did, really, mm-hmm, yeah, whatever." Then Louis said he didn't see it and that his homies did and told him about it, but if he didn't see it, it didn't matter and that he's sorry he brought it up. Appeased, Flora gets mushy. "I miiiiss yooou!" Oh, gawd.

Mike picks up Joe at the airport, back from giant-banging. Joe says he's all refreshed now and ready to work on the business. Ha ha! No one did anything, except for Sarah, who ate bagels in the name of research. Sarah tells Joe that no one else wanted to do anything with her, and that "it kind of sucked." Way to spell it out. Joe says, "If we blow this opportunity, it's gonna stink." Well, prepare to stink up the place, people.

Real World

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