Real World
Analyze This

Episode Report Card
Kim: D | 1 USERS: A+
Analyze This

Julie, Matt, and Melissa are in the car. Julie is driving. Melissa is sitting in back and Matt is lying with his head in her lap. Matt says that the last seven girls he told to look at his website all wanted to "chill," and I'm guessing he means that in the Teck Money sense of the word. Julie channels me for a minute and says, "You have got to be joking me." Matt says that his "webpage is on fire" and that he doesn't get phone calls like David, but he gets girls signing his guestbook instead. Now I feel dirty because I've looked at his site before. In an interview, Matt explains about his website for those who haven't seen it, explaining that it contains pictures of him and his daily journal, and that it's a little chunk of him that's not accessible when he first meets someone. Melissa jokes that she's worried about what will happen to him when the computer crashes. In an interview, Melissa says that Matt really believes that the woman who will be the love of his life will fall into his lap some day. Melissa asks Matt about Kelley from 735 (hereafter referred to as 735Kelley to avoid confusion). Matt says that he liked her, and wonders if he should call. To Julie's credit, she doesn't go insane with jealousy and run the car off the road. Melissa says, with much eye-rolling, that he can't call her yet, because she has to check out his website first. Ha! Score one for Melissa. Matt says that she signed his guestbook three times already, and now it's his turn, and he's contemplating his next move. Julie calls him the "biggest cyberdork [she's] ever heard of." Matt retorts that the name is "cyber pimp" so "step off." Here's Matt's problem. He tries to crack jokes, but he has no sense of sarcasm or delivery or emotion of any kind, so it seems like he's serious when he's really not. I truly believe that was supposed to be a joke, but he said it so deadpan that I could see it being misunderstood as serious, kind of like when he said drag queens were like scary clowns. Also, on behalf of everyone who has a personal website, I would like to say that Matt is a cyberdork, and if he really thinks that women are going to be so impressed by his website that they will want to date him, he is sadly mistaken. I mean, it's a decent site, but it's not that great.

Matt has two girls over to the house, and one of them is 735Kelley. We never do get to find out the other chick's name. 735Kelley has bleached blonde hair and dark circles drawn around her eyes. I'm guessing she's trying to get more camera time by doing her makeup like a raccoon, hoping that Matt likes raccoons, because of the coat. In an interview, Julie says, "Wow, Matt's not asexual." Ha! Julie with the funny. The music keeps repeating, "There's something wrong with this picture," and for a minute, I think that 735Kelley is going to turn out to be a man or something. Julie and Melissa are giggling about Matt's guests. Jamie checks out the guests and then giggles with the girls (or like a girl, if you prefer). I have to admit to rewinding the shot where Jamie lifts up his shirt, exposing his stomach. I know, it's so wrong. I can't help it. If you cut off his head, he's not bad looking. Anyway, Matt impresses 735Kelley but showing her his closet, and then introduces her to Julie, Melissa and Jamie.

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Real World




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