Arbitrary Guy in Suit stands at a podium making a speech as the style-show attendees sit at their tables thumbing through spiral-bound books containing photographs of Elka's mother, Yolanda. Guy in Suit tells us that "there are very few people who have the capability of touching so many of us" and Yolanda was one of those people and death-be-not-proud-or-funny-cakes. Guy in Suit continues that Elka's family is being presented with some kind of gift that will "make it possible for the family to preserve their best image of Yolanda." Wax statue? Rendering in velvet? Taxidermy gift certificate? I'm at a loss. Elka voice-overs that she knows her mom was looking down on her as she offers the pithy speech to the room, "On behalf of the family, I would like to say thank you very, very much." The fashion show begins at the distance of twelve million miles from the nearest MTV camera, and all that is recorded is Elka's facial expressions during it. She appears to be smiling. The Puffy Combs remake of "I'll Be Watching You" rages on to cue the home viewer into feeling sad, which doesn't minimize Elka's mourning even slightly in this shamelessly commodified pulling of the heartstrings kind of way. Because Sting -- and Puffy -- and B.I.G. himself -- all know just exactly how she feels. What. Ever.
Back in Boston, Genesis is again on the phone with her mother. Poor Genesis. No wonder she's such a mess. If this woman were my mother, I too would change Mother's Day to March. And then I'd throw myself off a bridge in February. Here's a sample:
Jacqueline Daniels: This is so sick.
Genesis: What?
Jacqueline Daniels: I haven't eaten in, like, a week. I'm gonna eat tonight.
Genesis: Why haven't you eaten in a week?
Jacqueline Daniels: Same old...I don't deserve to eat, though.
Genesis: What do you mean, you don't deserve to eat? [Glacial pause. The Victorian Era begins and ends] Hello?









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