Real World
Fat Tuesday

Episode Report Card
Kim: D | Grade It Now!
Fat Tuesday

A marching band goes by the house, part of one of the many parades. Some girl is working her flag for all it's worth. She is sassy with her little marching band uniform! Julie wants Melissa to come outside and watch the parade, but Melissa is busy emailing someone. Okay, I confess. It was me. She was feeding me insider info. If you send me money, I'll tell you all the behind-the scenes dirt. Julie is frustrated with Melissa's slowness. I don't know why she can't go out by herself. Julie has a cute little gray dress on. In an interview, Julie says that it's Mardi Gras and that people are sleeping (shot of David sleeping on couch) or shopping on Magazine Street, and it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. While I agree with her for the most part, it's not really a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. It happens every year. I think she knows that once her parents see these episodes, she'll be locked in her room until she gets married. Julie and Melissa stand out on their porch and watch the parade. Melissa does her ass-slapping dance move for the crowd, to my dismay. They see some little girls dressed up like princesses on a float. Julie and Melissa practice the "elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist" beauty queen wave. Julie likes the princesses. Suddenly, it's night-time and "Shake Your Bon Bon" is playing on the soundtrack. Women are shaking their naked bon bons all over the place. And with this one woman, I do mean literally ALL over the place. I think one of those babies flew up here to New York State! I caught it and threw it back. See the subtle comparison between Julie / princesses / daytime and Melissa / naked chicks / night-time? So subtle.

Danny says that they are invited to dinner at Anne Rice's house. I should state right now that I am not a fan of Anne Rice as a person or as an author. I've read, like, two of her books, and I hated them. And I used to work in the book industry, and I've heard stories. Just so you fans out there know where I'm coming from: I know I'm biased. Anyway, there's a note stuck to the wall explaining about the "catered" dinner. Matt says he doesn't know if he will go. Kelley says they are expecting all of the roommates. Danny points out that it's catered, like Anne Rice can't afford to absorb the cost of one meal. But it would be rude, and really, why wouldn't you go? Free meal! Sign me up! Matt admits that he doesn't know who she is. Does he live in a cave? I know she's not as big now as she was like five years ago, but she's still kind of a household name, isn't she? Kelley is shocked at Matt's ignorance, and prompts, "Interview With A Vampire?" and then points out that she is a "famous artist" and "the most famous person in New Orleans, by far." Okay, I know Kelley is probably exaggerating to make a point, but I would not refer to Anne Rice as an "artist." Hack? Sure. Publicity whore? Definitely. Egomaniac? You betcha. Artist? Not really. I don't live in New Orleans, so I can't really comment on the whole "most famous" part, but I'm sure someone will in the "Embittered locals speak out" thread in the forums. Kelley points out what a big deal it is that Anne Rice invited only them to dinner. Danny says that she probably doesn't know that she invited "seven dorks to dinner." Kelley jokes that they will be like, "Hey, pull my finger, Anne." I laugh because farts = funny. ["I laugh because reading about farts = funny, and also because I've been awake for almost twenty-four hours." -- Wing Chun] Jamie (who knew he was sitting there?) looks confused. Matt looks annoyed. Shut up, Matt. I know he wasn't talking. It was a pre-emptive shut up.

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