Real World
Jailhouse Doc

Episode Report Card
Stee: D | Grade It Now!
Wes And Wesser

Warehouse. Night. Neh works on the doc. He is the only one working, he tells us, and the others are out drinking and partying -- and we see them at the bar, Wes dancing with girls, etc. This is intercut with Neh bitching to us that everyone is depending on him to get it done and wah wah wah. Wes camera-ghosts that he's more than willing to put all the responsibility on Neh right now. Generous of him.

Later. The camera gets all foggy and the sound all weird and...yay! It's another installment of Wes Is Blind Drunk! Wes is home standing in the living room, weaving, barely able to stand. He tells Mel he has to walk around a bit. He stumbles backward. He weaves into the girls' room and goes into the closet with Mel and rips the closet door off its track. Mel is laughing; she's in a bikini and there is some random girl in the room with them. Wes throws a cushion at Mel, who runs and laughs. Lacey has to bring everything down, asking very seriously if Wes is going to puke. Who cares?! Let him break shit. Damn, I just realized: Wes is Beavis! He weaves around some more.

Rachel and crew get home, and Rachel tells us that she wanted to go call that boyfriend of hers she hates, but that Wes was on the phone. Apparently, she told him not to be too long on the phone, and Neh yelled over from the kitchen, telling Rachel not to tell anyone how long to use the phone. Then she flipped Neh off, and suddenly Wes -- and this the lame cameramen finally capture -- gets in her face, still blind drunk, and tells her that if she flips off his friend again, he'll slap the shit out of her. She asks him "please" to hit her, and he puts his hand on her face and sorta pushes it, but really is just doing a fake slap. Rachel laughs. Wes goes back to the phone. Come on, Wes. Homegirl has the ears of dead Iraqi soldiers on a necklace -- you ain't gonna scare her with that wack shit.

But then I guess something happens later, because Rachel is telling Mel and crew that when Wes finally got off the phone, she asked him if he still wanted to slap her face...and he slapped her for real. But it's sorta confusing, because of course the cameramen didn't capture it -- or they don't wanna show it for legal reasons or something -- so we just get Rachel now camera-fatting that the slap wasn't hard enough to move her face, but that it made a sound. Just like this show. She goes on to say that Wes has a lack of respect for people that comes out of anger. Okay.

Later. Bathroom. Wes is still drunk, but drinking water and, I guess, sobering up. He apologizes to Mel, in a drunk whisper, for throwing "something" at her earlier. He is then surprised when Mel informs him that he slapped Rachel. He's still blind drunk, but he can't remember what he did earlier, during the same drunk? Call AA. And take the whole house with you. He goes into Rachel's room, and the girls yell at him to get out. Rachel runs out. Lacey tells him that Rachel is mad about the slap. Wes claims that it must have just been a light tap -- which it probably was. He demonstrates on himself, and then puts his tongue out and it's very disturbing to me. I wish so much that he would stop. Lacey tells us that she hates the drunkenness because it's ridiculous. Yes. It's called getting drunk and loosening up a little, Lacey. You should seriously look into it. Wes slurs, mad now, that he could give a fuck. Mel says that no one deserves to get hit. He brings up the blackout argument, claiming that he wasn't really there. Convincing. Commercials.

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