Real World

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Stee: C- | 360 USERS: C+
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Jose Locates His Balls

Night. Key West. Finger-pointing. Jose says that he's not scared of Janelle and that he will punch her in the face. Whoa! Tyler earns a few bucks from B/M by saying that he had to hold Janelle back and that "anything could happen because they are pissed." They finally all get into the car.

House. House. Stupid statue. House. Office. Tyler, friend, and Zach sit around as Janelle babbles about Jose and how she's not going to talk to him anymore. God, she loves this. Tyler laughs. Then Tyler breaks it the fuck down: "Janelle has this mentality that she thinks she is basically Mariah Carey or Beyoncé, without the actual talent." Ooh, snap! But also, to be fair, I thought Mariah Carey was Mariah Carey without the talent. Montage of Janelle talking and finger-waving. Zach eats. Tyler laughs.

Statue. Platypus. Rooster. (I'm not kidding.) Alcove off the deck. Poor Katie, Tyler's sweet-faced blonde guest, has to sit with Jose, all high on telling off Janelle. He talks about it. He talks. He talks. He's going to fight fire with fire, he says. He talks about what more mature people might have done. Katie talks about staying out of conflict and how he might have handled it better. Jose pats himself on the back some more. Here's how I know Jose is gay: he's not trying to mack on Katie, drunk in a private alcove.

House. Water. Night. Morning. Fast clouds. House. Leaves. House. Bathroom I've Never Seen. Janelle and Paula. Janelle tells Paula she now thinks Jose is insecure and that's why he yelled at her. As she puts on makeup, Janelle goes on to invent a term I now love and will use as often as I can: she says that Jose used her as an "escape goat" for his insecurity. Escape Goat! Love. Paula doesn't bat an eyelash. Either equally dumb or kind. Janelle camera-talks that people are quick to judge her as being stuck-up, but that she doesn't think it's true. Quick cut to her, amazing body and tiny skirt, finger-waving and doing a fairly good charade clue for "stuck-up." Her speech continues, but I can't listen to it.

Real World

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