Real World
Janelle And Jose's Fight

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Jose Locates His Balls
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously...Janelle predicted that there will be some fighting; she said she can "intimidate" people at times. ("Intimidate," "blend into the background," same diff.) The salon opened. Paula went walnuts. Jose stood up for himself. His eyebrow waxing shone in the reflected glory.

Opening credits. Tired script. Bathing suits. Skin cancer.

Day. House. Deck. Stupid fucking statue. Jose sits in the hammock and makes a list, camera-waxing that he feels he's not pulling his weight as assistant manager, and Zach needs to realize they are a team. Oh please oh please let this whole episode be about the delicate manager/assistant manager relationship! Oh please!

Well, it looks promising, as Janelle, driving with Tyler and Zach, asks Zach what Jose is doing as ass. man. (Ass man!) Zach says that he himself has taken over the opening and feels like it's his fault that Jose now has nothing to do. (Tyler took over an opening just two episodes ago!) Zach thinks he could delegate better. He could also groom better. Janelle asks Zach if she can borrow Jose for help with marketing to local businesses, since she's been busy hitting up all the local hotel "con-see-airs." Janelle camera-snots that she's been very busy. (Perhaps she should find some time in her busy schedule to read a dictionary. Or maybe those nineteen coats of lip-liner take all her precious free time to apply.)

Water. Water. Houses. Deck. Paula's spotted chest and Svet discuss Jose. He's very young and doesn't know how to talk -- he speaks over his emotions, ignoring them in the process. "It's empty," says Paula. Svet says he makes her uncomfortable. Paula thinks one day he'll snap; Svet wants Jose's eventually postal-going to be "mean and funny." Paula receives $100 in foreshadowing money from the episode producer for saying, "Jose's the kind of person that you don't want to see him mad, because it'll take it to a place he never wants to go." Cha-ching!

House. Day. Office. With Tyler's awesome painting as a backdrop, Janelle rudely grills Jose on what he's been doing as assistant blah blah blah. What the fuck authority does Janelle have to grill him? Jose outranks her. "Bitch, drop and give me fifty!" he should say. Instead, Jose's face goes dark and he complains that everyone is taking his duties away. Janelle snottily says that Jose is getting defensive. Zach looks down, letting his unusually-droopy jewfro hide his eyes. They go back and forth pseudo-politely until Janelle gives Jose a lesson on "marketing." She says that you have to "focus," and that she's starting at "the top," starting with "hotel con-sea-airs." Jose listens to her, positively sneering. He camera-brows that Janelle thinks she's a diva and that she's better than everyone. Janelle wants him to go out in a two-mile radius and hit up businesses. He says that he has been. She says the two-mile radius is his "position," and is thus his to "control." Um, are they still talking about their tanning salon? I'm getting confused. Dramatic music. Jose tells us that Janelle is rude.

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Real World

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