Real World
Kat and Mike Go For It

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Kat and Mike Go For It

Mike takes the train to the British countryside, to a place called "Minister International." They don't really explain what Minister International is, but it seems to be a place that will "help Michael race cars." And that's all we the viewers really need to know or care about Minister International. On his way there he informs us -- the viewers -- by way of a voice-over that it's always been his dream to race cars in England because England has the best drivers. Do the best drivers in the world want to race with Michael?

Graham Fuller is the "big dog" of Minister International, explains Michael. Um, Michael? By "big dog," are you giving us the MTV-speak for "CEO"? Or by "big dog" do you mean some really annoying guy who licks you on the face when you enter the room and humps your leg when you sit down? Graham Fuller turns out to be a different "big dog" altogether -- the kind that eats whatever scraps you feed him without question. This is because Graham is going to let Michael become a part of Minister International as long as he can come up with a huge hunk of money. Yes, that's right. This episode isn't going to be about Michael racing or competing. For the next half hour, we're going to see Michael try to come up with a quarter-of-a-million dollars. Or rather, for the next half hour, we're going to see Michael lie around while he occasionally calls a friend of his who is supposed to raise a quarter-of-a-million dollars. But in case you were feeling deprived of some good, old-fashioned Days of Thunder-type action, there is some footage of Graham Fuller giving Michael a tour of the garage where Michael, in his ironed rugby shirt and baseball cap, sits in cars that are up on blocks and talks about how fast each car goes. Oh, and then Graham -- in a scene that's supposed to be the British-racecar-driver version of Debbie Allen's speech during the opening credits of Fame -- gives Michael a speech about being motivated and not "being on holiday." "We expect our drivers to work!" Oooh, the tension is just building. Okay, now the tension subsides because that was about the most exciting thing that happens to Michael in this entire episode, and from here on in, it's just pathetic.

Graham "interviews" Michael to see if he's worthy to race for Minister International. Michael tells Graham that he placed seventh and third in a race. What race? National? Regional? I mean couldn't you conceivably be telling Graham that you were just racing your friends home from the 7-11? Graham welcomes him aboard because that's just the way things work on The Real World.

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