Real World
Kidney a Break

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Kidney a Break

In the tag from last week's episode, Aneesa, Keri, and CJP agree that if they had to sleep with one of their roommates, it would be Chris. CJP adds that Chris would "make you breakfast in the morning, hold you all night, and call you the next day." Wishful thinking?

Previously on The Real World: Tonya felt like she was in the ghetto because there were police sirens outside. But don't worry. It's not like someone was murdered a block from their house or...wait. That did happen. Kyle called Tonya "the backwoods Pam Anderson." Tonya told her roommates that people called her "Barbie" in high school, and she's really athletic, and she loves people. Aneesa thought Tonya was annoying. Join the club, girl.

The roommates go out to a bar and have a great time. In an interview, Tonya says that she wants to get to know her roommates, but that they are all into going out and having a good time, and she's not. Into having a good time. While the roommates stay at the club, Tonya gets a cab and goes home. Please note that in this scene, one might assume that she (a) has some form of picture ID since she got into the club and (b) knows how to hail a cab on her own. It will be important later. On the way home, Kyle asks the group at large how long it took Tonya to leave the club. CJP answers, "Fourteen seconds?" Kyle points out that it took her ten minutes to figure out how to work the ATM and only fifteen, or fourteen, seconds to leave the club. How hard is it to use an ATM? You read the screen, you push the buttons, the money pops out like candy. Christ, even my hometown grocery store, where the produce section consists of like three apples and a forlorn-looking head of iceberg lettuce, has an ATM, and people use it. So don't give me that small-town crap. ["That really is bullshit. I've been using ATMs for sixteen years -- that's practically as long as Tonya's been alive, right?" -- Wing Chun] In an interview, Kyle carefully chooses his words and says that Tonya has "aggravated [him] a little bit," and has "aggravated everybody in the house a little bit."

In the hot tub, Tonya tells Chris that she is fat, and then stops herself and says, "Did I just say I was fat? Most girls would, like, die to look like this." Okay, she has a nice body, I guess. She's got big boobs, and I think most guys would stop there. But she's really high-waisted or something and often her pants and bathing suit bottoms just look...wrong. I wouldn't have pointed it out if she hadn't been bragging about her great body. Then she gives a shrill laugh. Chris just ignores her, or tries to. In an interview, Chris says that Tonya is "high-maintenance" and then backpedals that Tonya is "adjusting, and we all need to give her time to adjust." Whatever. I saw this segment on Dateline NBC about these guys from Africa who were living in the United States. Most of them had never seen a television or a grocery store. Those dudes took less time to adjust than Tonya. On the phone, Tonya tells her boyfriend Richie Rich that she feels like a little girl in the big city. Ugh.

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