Real World

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: D | 306 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Kissing Professor Stoner's Ass

Mark's office. He's set up an appointment with a realtor -- he, Sarah, and Flora are going to look at store spaces. Sarah is psyched, Flora sulky. Mark looks all intense and Sipowicz-y. They look at the place. The realtor says, "This is choice!" That is so '80s. Mark gets all excited and talks about putting refrigerators in and having gummy bears over there, and Flora scowls and stomps around and is generally disagreeable. In a sit-down, Flora wears a yellow, lace-up pirate shirt, making her seem completely bizarre when she says, "This is my business, and I'm not going to give it up like that." Girl, give up the yellow lace-up pirate shirts. Now.

Now we're back in New York. You can tell because they have footage of yellow cabs and the Empire State Building. Joe's having lunch with Cordell and doing his work for the class at the same time. And here I though Joe was a unitasker. Cordell leads Joe through the assignment: "These are just some questions to read to the class, about you." Joe's like, "Yeah! I'll do it!" Because Joe wants all work to be all about him.

Business meeting with Mark. It's tense. Mike plays the bad cop. "It's our money, it's your idea. We're going to allocate 85\% of the shares, and what's left over? You can have up to 8\% of that." Oh, that seems fair. Mark, a total pro, says, "We're going to take a look at your offer. We're not far." Flora blinks rapidly and looks pissed. Sarah says, "We'll hear from you in the morning then! Night!"

Surprisingly, there are no Tense Chords to score this fight between Sarah and Flora. Sarah says, "Mark is not out to make a quick buck!" I don't think he is, either. Mark, unlike the rest of these clowns, saw an opportunity and went for it. Sarah then relays via voice-over, "They don't have to have Mark at all, if they're such brainiacs." See, but they're not, though. They do need Mark. She keeps yelling at Flora: "Who are you on the phone to all day getting advice? You just wanna take, take, take, and take, take, take some more! Maybe tomorrow Mark will give us the big thumbs down, and then you'll feel really accomplished!" Yeah! Flora lets the dog out and yells, "But I'm not going to go to bed with Mark, and you're not going to go to bed with Mark, you're not going to suck his dick." That was not a strange edit, people. Sarah rolls her eyes and delivers this zinger: "You're right, Flora, I've never done that to get a job." Mike says, "Ooh," all Mike Douglas-y. Flora says, "You have to think of Mark as a partner, not as a friend, and I've never sucked a dick to get a job, either." Here I cough and say "Louis." You probably do too. Sarah says, "You proposed it, man." We see the house at night, and the moon in the sky, and we're out.

Real World

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