Real World
Like a Virgin

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Like a Virgin

Back to the grill session. Andre asks Julie what she ate at Lox Around the Clock. She says chicken and some other items and some kind of "pea or bean." Andre asks, "How was the conversation?" and Julie says, straight-faced, "Stimulating."

Flashback to Julie and Le Grand Fromage at Lox Around the Clock. She looks less than stimulated. Like, almost comatose. LGF reaches over to massage her shoulder and arm. Julie gives him the hairy eyeball and asks what he's doing. He says, "Checking for muscle content," and proceeds to tell her she has a sturdy frame. Julie sort of rolls her eyes and comments that she also has wide hips, so she'd be good for breeding. LGF chuckles. Then he checks out her hips and says she doesn't have sturdy hips. Then he makes her high-five him. Then he tells her she has a good tape collection and something else stupid that he obviously thinks is wildly flattering, and asks her if she wants to get married. Let me just say that this is the worst date I've ever seen or heard about. It may even top the date my friend Susan went on with the guy who showed her pictures of his three kids -- all by different women.

Back to the grill session. Norman remarks dryly that she's found quite a prize. Heather and Norman speculate how old LGF is. They say older than thirty-one or younger than forty-one. Julie squawks, "You guys are driving me crazy!"

Back to the date. LGF murmurs to Julie, "You have a tremendous capacity for someone nineteen years old." Yes -- a tremendous capacity for bile, going by how long Julie's been able not to throw up on his shoes. Julie tells him, "You're obsessed with that." LGF says, "Would you call me Dad?" and then starts cackling. Julie looks appalled and tries to keep eating, looking away and ha-ha-ing uncomfortably. Jesus! Why the hell didn't Bunim-Murray send her on this date with a taser gun? This guy should be put down as quickly as possible!

Julie's one-on-one. She snots at LGF and his dumb comments.

Back to the grill session. Heather sympathizes with Julie and says she doesn't like to talk about her dates, either. Norman says he wants to know more about Julie's "strapping young buck." Someone else -- I think Andre -- wants to know where they met.

Date flashback. LGF stands up, murmuring something about a wicked cramp in his leg, and leaves the table.

Julie's one-on-one. She says she knew things were not going well when her date got up to go stretch out at the bar. She says, "I knew I was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

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