Real World
Mi Familia

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C- | Grade It Now!
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Judd Likes Pam. Pass It On.

Back to the awkward dinner. "Sister" asks someone to pass her the cabbage, and for some reason Pedro passes it like she said, "There's a bomb in the cabbage. Hand me the bowl." Rachel goes blabbing on about what college she wants to go to and where she'd like to fight for the Republican party but I can't actually hear her unless I bulge my eyes like she does and the last time I tried to pay attention to Rachel I got a migraine that lasted a full week. I've learned my lesson. MamaRachel is just pissed about something, but she's mumbly and we don't ever really get to find out what she's pissed about. Pedro says he sees a lot of MamaRachel in Rachel. Pedro says that MamaRachel is strong and controlling, just like Rachel. Cut to Rachel bitching about the entire state of Michigan. I hate Rachel. MamaRachel tells Rachel to apply at McDonald's. Pedro is amazed. Rachel says she can't believe they think there're a name tag and hairnet in her future. Rachel tells us that MamaRachel loves her children and expects a lot from them, so they're all over-achievers. Cut to a close-up of Rachel looking like Marie Osmond.

Rachel and MamaRachel are in a corner of a room near a chess table and it's too bright to see them. They're both wearing white shirts and jeans, so it's really just a white room with two heads and a chess table, as far as the camera can tell. MamaRachel is looking at some pictures of Rachel's roommates that Rachel has brought. MamaRachel is disgusted because she's now realizing that Rachel is living with a man with HIV, a man who's African-American, and a man who's Puck. She finds a picture of Puck and Rachel in bed (Puck looks naked under his sheets) and declares the entire thing "disgusting." Point for MamaRachel. Why would Rachel bring a picture of herself in bed with Puck? They talk about someone named Patty and someone named Francis, for some reason. Then MamaRachel says she doesn't like Rachel's behavior in these pictures. Rachel sasses, and MamaRachel calls the pictures "trash." She says that nobody should be naked in the house. Cut to a close-up on Mohammed so that he's actually in this episode, even if he's just in a photograph.

Shots of Phoenix. Rachel brings Pedro to MamaRachel's school to discuss his life with HIV. Rachel says that MamaRachel is "very trusting" to take Pedro to work. Pedro tells us he was nervous because Rachel's family and the principal of the school were present. Pedro stands in front of a classroom as he tells us he didn't want to offend anybody. Pedro takes questions from the class. Someone asks him how he got HIV. There's a shot here of MamaRachel holding her mouth, like this is the part where she's terrified Pedro will explain homosexuality. Pedro says that he got HIV from unprotected sex, and that he knows it because he's never done any drugs. The kids assume that Pedro got it through heterosexual sex, and Pedro doesn't correct them. They asks whether he dates now, and whether his girlfriend knows he's HIV-positive. He says that he's in a relationship right now with a person who's also HIV-positive. Rachel says it was important for the kids to focus on what was important, and not on Pedro's being gay, or the students might think that this was just a disease that gay people get. Pedro giggles a bit when someone asks about his girlfriends, and MamaRachel hides her eyes in shame. I can't listen to Rachel's confessional if she's going to sit behind that giant plush stuffed white tiger. There's a quick montage of Pedro charming the class while some cheesy music plays behind him. He ends with a Jerry Springer's Final Thought closer. The students applaud as they grab their backpacks. MamaRachel and some teacher point out Rachel's brother. Pedro tells him that he's the new brother in the family, and that BrotherRachel is on his way out. Rachel squints.

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