Real World
Mr. Mormon Arrives

Episode Report Card
Kim: D | Grade It Now!
Mr. Mormon Arrives

Julie is holding a meeting for their television show in the bedroom, and all roommates are in attendance. Julie mentions that the show will start with Melissa's segment, and then another segment to be determined during that meeting, and then "close with the band." In an interview, Matt informs us that the next show is "Julie's child." Is that like Destiny's Child? Does that mean that the show will ask if I can pay its bills, can I pay its telephone bills, can I pay its automobills, and if I did then maybe we could chill. That song always bugged me, because what the fuck is an "automobill"? I get that they combined "automobile" and "bill" into one word, but it still doesn't make sense. Oh yeah, the show. Matt tells us that Julie wants them to be natural and funny. Julie starts running down the segments they have planned, and then tells us in an interview that she wants it to be "Dave Letterman meets Tom Green meets Belfort Seven!" If anyone puts poo on a microphone, I'm turning this off. I can't abide that. Melissa, who will be doing a fashion segment, says she'll be like, "You cannot wear stone-washed jeans with a zipper on the bottom!" Hee! She's funny. I swear, I'm not just saying that because she may have posted in our forums. Okay, it would have been funnier if she said "acid-washed." Matt says he's willing to do "a mullet search," which is funny, and a total shout-out to MBTV's own Megyn, who also does mullet searches. Julie think that would be hilarious, and others agree. Random shots of all the roommates for no apparent reason. I wonder if Jamie and Kelley are friends this week? I love how the producers build up this huge fight, and then never mention it again. Oh, I forgot, they "made up" at the end of the last episode. Yeah, I still don't buy it.

Next, we see a "Mullet Hunters" segment, featuring David, Jamie and Matt. It's actually kind of amusing. David is brushing his goatee with what looks like a shoe polishing brush. I hope that was supposed to be an homage to some '70s cop show I never saw, because otherwise it's just weird. I'm guessing it is because the music is all Shaft-y. In an interview, Matt explains what a mullet is. Is there anyone out there who doesn't know what a mullet is at this point? Or visited eighty websites devoted to them? Matt explains that it's short on the sides, long in the back. Okay, it was funny when he said, "Business in the front, party in the back." I'll grant him that. Matt says his job is to put together a little segment called "Matt the Mullet Hunter," and then he smiles. You know, when he smiles, he's kind of cute. He should smile more often. Anyway, we see shots of various mullet permutations around New Orleans. They interview one guy who says he cuts his hair himself (no!) and that chicks do dig it. Matt concludes his interview by saying it's "the most beautiful haircut" and it "brings a tear to [his] eye." Look, sure, mullets equal funny. But doesn't it seem kind of weird that Mister Christian is all having fun at the expense of others? He can claim that it's mullet worship all he wants, but the whole thing is obviously tongue-in-cheek. I personally have no problem with having fun at the expense of others -- I do it every week, right here! But for someone who claims to be so religious, I would think Matt would consider it a sin. David and Matt walk away and wonder where Jamie went. David says he's taping "that little ass that just went by." We see Jamie following some unsuspecting girl down the street with the camera. Ew! That is borderline harassment, right there. He's all proud of himself. Yuck.

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Real World




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